The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hi Debb Acceptance is tricky. Before program I would always see a defect, and jump to action and change. This never worked:(
Alanon reminded me that I needed to completely "Accept" the situation as it was before I jumped to action. I needed to realize that acceptance did not mean I approved of the action or situation ,but that I saw it and realized that was something that needed attention and I stopped fighting the reality of it.
Once I fully lived with that thought I could move forward into action." Do not just do something just sit here "was a good tool for me to gain acceptance. Thanks for the topic.
This one really speaks to me. I have been thinking about making a major change, and I am not sure how it will all work out. I am trying to be ok with that.
The thing that hit me most was the idea of accepting a situation as it is. I have been slowly coming to terms with my situation, and accepting things as they are (instead of pretending that they are the way I want them to be) has been a real challenge.
What I am realizing is that, by accepting things as they are, and seeing things for what they are, I am able to respond in a healthy way. It is when I pretend that things are NOT the way they are that I second guess myself and the validity of my decisions.
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Skorpi
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
Acceptance for me is a complete surrender to what is vs. what I want it to be. Once I realized that acceptance meant surrender vs. concurrence, it opened a new world for me and this program. When I stopped thinking my way was the best/right way and realized others could do things different and it was OK, life changed.
Staying program-centered and God-centered vs. self-centered helps me with acceptance which in turn helps me with serenity which in turn helps me heal. It's a process, ongoing and revisited at times.
Great post - great shares everyone. Thanks and hugs to all!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Acceptance was actually easier to me than awareness. I had a hard time getting awareness. Once I became aware I could accept.... but it was a hard time to see through the blind spots that I had. I didn't want to see. I didn't want awareness so I would ignore bad behavior or constantly "forgive and forget". That could never get me to acceptance. I was not getting aware.
