The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The C2C reading for September 14 speaks about the destructive habits that we develop having lived with the disease of alcoholism. It points out that because of many painful lessons and experiences, we tend to lose the ability to "Hope", sink into despair, shut down our feelings and refuse to care or Hope.
The reading goes on to explain that by working Al-Anon's 12 steps we can discover a spirituality that allows us to believe that there is very powerful reason to "Hope". With our belief in a Higher Power's help, regardless of the circumstances of our lives, we can feel fully alive in the moment and enjoy that feeling.
The meditation goes on to explain that the painful lessons of a lifetime,. are not learned overnight. .By attending meetings, sharing with our sponsor and continuing to use the tools, we will begin to feel safe and then learn how to feel our feelings, and express them in a constructive manner.
The reading confirms the concept that it is risky to care,because we may be disappointed,but in trying to protect ourselves from the pain, we often cut ourselves off from the many delights that life has to offer. Alanon tools offered tools to enable me to live with courage, serenity and wisdom and I am ever grateful.
l The quote is from Samuel Ullman. "Years may wrinkle the, skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul."
Prior to Al-Anon. I know I had shut down, abandoned hope and just wanted to fulfill my obligations. Thanks to HP and this powerful program I enjoyed life to the fullest. It has not always been easy , I had the joy and sorrow and with it all, The Steps, meetings and HP brought me back to Hope.
One of my biggest challenges to manage is critical days. By this, I mean birthday, mother's day, graduation day, etc. This disease has taught me that these are just days, ordinary days, like any other. However, I tend to get wrapped up in sadness as for me, these days are not recognized by those I love/live with.
It's my birthday month, and I dread that it's coming. It used to be such a fun day to feel special and be recognized. That went out with this disease and now I just dread that day. I have worked really, really hard to make others plans, do something different/special but the pain still arrives and tends to stay.
This reading reminds me that no matter what happens on these 'days', I am special in the eyes of my HP. I don't need to shut down and I have the right to be sad and grieve. Just because it's happened before doesn't mean it will happen again.
I find gratitude in the realization that I used to feel 'this way' every day. I truly am grateful that my sadness/anxiety is now just a few days each year. I am hopeful that there will be a time when all days are equal and I can embrace with peace and grace each day as if it's not unique or special.
Thanks for your service!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Beautifully honest share ,IAMHERE . I did learn that I could plan my own party (did so recently) and have fun. I saw that it is not personal as alanon suggests so it was not necessary to be hurt by their inattention .
My family are so involved in the negative and chaos that they are not capable of planning or giving much attention to positive actions.
ODAT placing principles above personalities we can enjoy life.
And that's what I needed to hear Betty.....I try really hard to not take things personally and do well often.....then these darn 'days' roll around and I find myself 'weaker' than other days. I do not know why these 'days' do this and I am trying to change it.
So, perhaps that's what I'll do....gives me something else to think about and consider!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thank you as well Betty, Al-anon has given me hope and peace. I do not seek perfection, just a better way to look at my world and I have attained that, thanks to MIP and Al-anon.
__________________
"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it
does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart". ~ unknown
