I agree with Betty, I would consult an attorney. Wising you the best JV.

It really is going to depend on the state and if your income is low you may qualify for legal aide .. two things I learned in consulting an atty and trust me I've had practice these lovely people on MIP can attest to is go to more than one you get a free consultation and the questions I would ask is how does this apply to common law marriage, start off with a divorce atty because if common law does apply then you need to have someone versed in the common law arena. Do not share that information with your sig other because you don't want him seeking an atty I think you should be able to contact the DV office explain the situation and ask them I would be honest, I have concerns about my STBXAB needing to be removed from my home what are my options because I am concerned that things could get ugly. They may be able to tell you about other services that could assist you in removing someone from the home.

Big hugs .. that's the hard thing about splitting up assets when there is no contractual marriage it can get dicey. It's hard enough when there is a marriage contract .. it still gets dicey. It is the financial end of things that are so ugly.

S :)

Well at least he's back to being more reasonable again. Sadly though, I don't know how long that will last. He is so unpredictable! We had a horrible fight again this morning where he called me a b*** and I called him a crackhead cheater. He said he wasn't leaving and I said maybe I would have to call some of my big male friends to physically escort him out of the house and then he was going to call the cops on me for threatening him. He has called the cops on me two or three times now and it has never worked out well for him. I got him to stop by threatening to call his parents and telling them everything if he did that but now I wonder if I should have just let him call the cops, because every time that has happened they have either taken him away or made him leave. I also begged him not to make this so difficult. Then I told him that I could probably get a restraining order if I had to, but that I really didn't want to because if I did that, that we would not be allowed any contact which meant we would not be able to work together anymore to do our gigs. (I need the money from those gigs.) I told him to Google it because I did and I know that he's going to find a lot of men whining about how easy it is for a woman to get a restraining order against them with no proof of any wrongdoing on their part. That seemed to give him pause for thought.

Thanks for the advice everyone. I will try and get a consult with a lawyer. It would be good to know where I stand legally.

-- Edited by hotrod on Thursday 3rd of September 2015 11:26:25 AM

I agree with Mattie, JUV, I would stop interacting with him and contact an attorney to start
legal processes. Threatening is a boundary that when crossed, should be taken seriously.
Wishing you the best outcome.

-- Edited by Debb on Thursday 3rd of September 2015 05:15:05 PM

It is sad that things have hit crisis point.  I don't want to minimize the distress of the situation, but it sounds as if your gig with him - being the only gig you'd had for so long - was keeping you with him even though the relationship was getting very toxic as his insanity progressed.  In the long run maybe being free of him will mean that you find other ways and means without having to drag a toxic person behind you as you've been having to do.  It sounds as if he was going downhill so fast that the end was bound to come.  With what you've been figuring out about the drugs and the recording, I'm wondering what other things he was up to that you don't know about right now.  Could well be scary things!  I'm glad this has happened before some worse craziness meant you were in danger.  Take good care of yourself!