The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
You are young, my son, and, as the years go by, time will change and even reverse many of your present opinions. Refrain therefore awhile from setting yourself up as a judge of the highest matters. Plato
1,2,3 I do on a daily basis because I'm a control freak .. lol. 4 is a mini step for me, based upon the situation. 5 - 7 those are steps I match with 4. 8, 9 I'm in the willing stage. 10 - 12 I try and take with me on a daily basis.
It's a lifetime thing because I didn't get here over night and I will not get better overnight either. It's a process and I like to think of myself as an onion going for the center .. I don't know if I will get there in this lifetime .. it sure feels better to grow than be stagnate.
I work the steps sequentially and if you ask about I do pick a step and work on that through a book study one month at a time.
There are so many ways in terms of unfolding .. it can be painful .. again it's so worth it. I had to start growing where I stopped .. they say an Alcoholic stops maturing when they started drinking .. well my codie ways can be traced back the same way .. I stopped growing or had stunted growth based upon where I stopped taking care of me and for some of us that started earlier than later.
Hugs .. keep coming back!! Great topic!!
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Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism. If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do "faith". - Brene Brown
"Whatever truth you own doesn't own you" - Gary John Bishop
That's a relief. You've given me permission to do steps 1, 2 and 3 every day like I'd like to, that would work for me. Then I guess I can move on when the time is right.
OMG perfectionism is so blatant in me right now, it's crazy! I'd never noticed it before today and I would never have identified as a perfectionist. It stops me from doing EVERYTHING! How absurd to be scared to 'do it wrong'.
Anyway. Thanks for answering my question and for the hugs and encouragement to keep coming back :) I enjoyed everything you wrote
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You are young, my son, and, as the years go by, time will change and even reverse many of your present opinions. Refrain therefore awhile from setting yourself up as a judge of the highest matters. Plato
Do you have a sponsor because before you get into a 4 which first time is a big one .. I always encourage people to have support through 4 because it's way to easy to get into the beat myself up phase of everything and that's not what a step 4 is .. so make sure you have support of a sponsor!!
Hugs!!
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Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism. If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do "faith". - Brene Brown
"Whatever truth you own doesn't own you" - Gary John Bishop
I am working my steps for the second time around; back at step 1 right now after having worked them recently all the way through. But, I've found that you never actually stop working the steps especially steps 1, 2 and 3. Actually, I find that I need to work them in some way every single day. They are the foundation from which all the others are supported upon.
I believe in sponsorship, though, while working the steps because it requires guidance and someone to hold your hand when things get emotionally raw for me. I agree with serenity, find a sponsor and get that guidance and then let yourself be open to what God has in store for you in the process. HUGS!
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Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be!
I have gone through the steps several times. I also believe strongly in sponsorship, and after completing the steps all the way once, there is nothing to stop one from doing any of them in any order at any time...
I too consider 1-2-3 each morning and I do 10 each night.
I've done step studies with groups, I've done steps with a couple sponsors and when I am troubled, I often will pick up a step and consider it to get me thru that moment/issue!
Great question - great thread!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
When I started Al-Anon and use to listen to the old timers and watch their body language I got the impression that they lived the program...the steps, traditions, concepts and slogans. From that I got the impression that I had to change my life and my way of living it. The early meetings use to say, "We are not a religion but if you work these steps religiously..." I knew what that meant and because my life was sooo screwed up because of my mis-management I committed myself to working the program religiously. I am still committed and my life is no where near what it was when I first got to the program and there is no alcoholism in it either. Yes I do have family members who are still practicing alcoholics and I also have non-alcoholics who practice the old form of living...I don't participate because my life tells me I am powerless and I can still accept unmanageability if I attempt self centered management. No thanks!! I love and rather have serenity and sanity. ((((hugs))))
As an old timer I hear that question often, I also hear I am so angry at myself I seem to end up in step one every day . To me thats progress there is always someone who won't do what I want , the way I want , when I want and it is a constant reminder that I cannot control what other people do .. I believe you learn to live the steps not just *do them* I was told early on that Al-Anon responses will become habitual , just like my old behavior had once been , Personally I don't think I am going to live that long , I slip occasionally just like most people I know . I too have been in several step groups this is not a once and your done deal . Relax , awarness brings progress you can`t change anything until you are aware that it is causing YOU a problem . Louise
I think the longer you are in program, the more you will start using the steps as a natural way of life but I also firmly believe that as you move thru your recovery process(which is lifelong) you will come to times in your life when you want to delve into the steps and traditions over and over again, depending on whats going on. Whenever I feel like I am getting a little complacent or things at home were not going as smoothly as they could be, I knew it was time to begin working the steps with a little more structure again (with my sponsor or a study group).
I attend a Step and Tradition meeting weekly I Do the first 3 steps each morning and a Step 10 every night. By living this program I do step 12 each day when I place principles above personalities and carry the message. I pray and meditate daily and that is Step 11 so I guess I do most of the steps daily.
