The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I would like to order an Alanon book from Amazon. What do you suggest as a first book? There are so many and I'm trying to read all the reviews for them and most are pretty good. I live with a recovering alcoholic husband. I have trouble with martyrdom, high expectations, laying blame, being unable to forgive and learning to live in the moment. Thanks in advance for the input!
Hi Rosanne, so glad you are looking to build an AlAnon library! As you saw, there are no poor choices when selecting any of the AlAnon Family Group endorsed publications, they all contain great experience, strength and hope.
In previous posts I have mentioned my great appreciation for the daily readers: One Day at a Time in AlAnon (ODAT), Courage to Change (C2C), and Hope for Today because of their tremendous utility and ease of use. Each day has a page that addresses a topic, many of which seem to speak directly to something I am struggling to have a more positive perspective on.
Each page takes only about 60 seconds to read but provides an entire day (at least) of thought and inspiration. I find that my growth in the program and ability to actually use program principals in "live" situations increased dramatically when I started reading daily from each of these. An added bonus is the appendix at the end where I can look up a topic I am struggling with, say detachment or resentment, find a list of pages that share a positive AlAnon perspective and new behavior to try out.
I also benefited greatly from Paths to Recovery, a book that works through each of the steps, traditions and concepts, providing meaningful background, probing questions to ask ourselves, and the experience,strength, and hope of other members dealing with each area. Reading through and spending time discovering my own answers to the questions helped me understand more fully, and in a more linear fashion (very helpful for how I process things) how the 12 steps can be used to gradually work through our thoughts and feelings in a healthy way.
Prior to reading, I was not convinced that working the steps was my thing. Shortly into the book I saw the wisdom and felt the motivation to make an orderly review of how the steps could serve as a guide for self discovery, and ultimately, self healing and growth.
Meetings are incredibly important, and comments from other members can be very helpful and encouraging. Each of us in a different place in our recovery, however, and with that also at different levels of incorporating the AlAnon perspective into our thoughts, shares, and advice. The pages from AlAnon Family Group books, however, are pure, unfiltered, and unadulterated recovery...we can't go wrong with turning to the guidance we find in their pages.
So glad that you are reaching out to AlAnon. I wish you the best on your journey of discovery and healing
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Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
I agree with all that Paul mentions + the How Al-Anon works. I would not buy this first though as it's more of a manual vs. an inspirational (IMO)....
You can also check your local library and thumb through a few if that helps you make a decision. I did this before placing my first order just so I would know what to expect.
You can NOT go wrong with any of the daily readers!!
Great question!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Well I posted something earlier and I guess it didn't take.
I love How Alanon Works as well as a daily reader.
It really depends on what you are wanting out of the books? They all have a things in them that when I am just wanting to read some recovery I can do so.
I also lean on the podcasts that are available .. they are always worth a good laugh at myself and it reminds me I'm really not that much of a special snowflake that I'm the only one who has gone through what I have gone through .. LOL.
Getting Them Sober the whole series is a great read and you can find that one at the local library usually. Vol 2 I believe is about dealing with a newly sober person. It might be 1? I can't remember anyway very short read and very black belt Alanon. It really should be CAL lit.
Hugs, hope you find what you need!
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Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism. If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do "faith". - Brene Brown
"Whatever truth you own doesn't own you" - Gary John Bishop
Thank you all! I think I am leaning toward ODAT and C2C. I also would love to listen to some of the podcasts.
Iamhere I checked my local public library and believe it or not didn't see any of the Alanon books. But I do want to go back and check out Getting Them Sober. I have only heard good things about that.
You might find other books that are related to Al-Anon but not approved literature. I am a 'borrower' for many things to test-drive - if I like it or think I'll use it often, I'll then go and buy it.
I also have purchased LOTS of Al-Anon books online (ebay) so I have spares to hand out....I love to support new comers, but it can get expensive quickly!
Good luck - you'll love those you've chosen!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
The only two books I own so far are How Al Anon Works and C2C. I think they're both excellent for different reasons. Another book I found helpful that isn't "Al Anon" literature but may as well be is Codependent No More by Melodie Beattie. Happy reading!
One I would recommend, that I didn't notice among the great suggestions you have already gotten is 'Paths to Recovery'. It is AlAnon sponsored literature. My sponsor required me to get this book when we started working together, and he uses it as our 'Text Book' if you will. Each section covers a Step, Tradition or Concept of AlAnon, and then has a series of thought provoking questions for the reader on what was just covered. I have learned a lot about myself, just through my own writing of answers to the questions. If you have a Sponsor, or an AlAnon friend you can work through with it together, you might find you get even more out of it.
Such a thought expressive post especially that Al-Anon has lots of "readers". I relied on my home group on which ones I got and got first because those were actually the ones we were working with and I got up and stayed up with the group from newbie to old timer. Our library here at home is complete and the daily readers are out on the breakfast table and travel with us often....Why?...staying tuned up in the thoughts and behaviors and spirit of recovery. Not every situation we encounter is with an alcoholic and the program works with all alcoholic or not. Its about keeping myself in check cause I cannot keep the world in check I've found. One of my biggest failings is "reacting" and I need to keep the program up front so that when I do get blind sided by something or someone I don't shoot myself in the foot by reacting poorly or at all. There are people in my life who I just expect to set me up and if I deal with the expectation (mine) first with a recovery attitude I get to smile again at it not happening again. The readers help me do that. Thanks for the reminder as I will read this morning. (((((hugs)))))
