Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Experience, strength, and hope from seasoned members about a meeting
Post Info TOPIC: Experience, strength, and hope from seasoned members about a meeting
Nana Benny


Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 5
Date:
Experience, strength, and hope from seasoned members about a meeting
Permalink  

Chaired a meeting this morning.  At the end, someone shared that they felt unwanted and unwelcome after the announcements when a rep. stated to please keep the focus on alcoholism.  And, there are other 12 steps groups for other addictions.  I think I cross-talked by commenting to the group about this share.  I spoke that we could have a group conscience about this topic, (which we scheduled), and that I felt we should remember how al-anon was started with Lois.  Afterwards, I felt I should not have commented at all?  Should I let it go, or apologize to this person when I see them after a meeting?

My feeling is generally that if I feel bad about it, I probably shouldn't have said it.no



__________________
Debb


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1661
Date:
Permalink  

NB, great questions!  I would pose your question to the National Al-Anon Office,

they would be the most knowledgeable and I would trust

there approach and response.

 

Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc

1600 Corporate Landing Parkway

Virginia Beach, VA 23454-5617

Telephone: (757) 563-1600

Fax: (757) 563-1656

email: wso@al-anon.org

 

 



-- Edited by Debb on Saturday 8th of August 2015 04:54:39 PM

__________________

 "Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it

does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart". ~ unknown

Debbie
hotrod


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 17196
Date:
Permalink  

Hi NB and welcome to Miracles in Progress. I do believe you handled the situation with great dignity and honored Al-Anons traditions. I have been in Al-Anon for over 30 years and have attended many, many meetings where it is announced that you are asked to keep the focus on ourselves, the topic that has been addressed and bring in no outside issues. "If you are a member of any other 12 Step Group please do no share on it -- This meeting has an alanon focus."

That announcement had been decided upon at a business meetings and was subject to the group conscience-- you were within your rights to suggest such an action.
Good work.



__________________
Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud
Iamhere


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 11569
Date:
Permalink  

Hello Nana Berry and welcome to MIP! Glad you are here.....and glad you brought this forward.

I believe (like Betty) that you didn't do anything wrong. In my home group, anytime there is something that's unknown, uncertain or potentially conflicting, we always table it for the next business meeting (group conscious). Our most recent 'funny' was cross-talking - but a member did it exactly as we are instructed not to - commented directly on another person's issue/share. It caused another member to interrupt and suggest that was cross-talk and not allowed, and the offending member acted as if it wasn't and didn't know what was the big deal.

Needless to say, by another engaging and suggesting it be discussed for clarification at the next business meeting, we were all able to regroup back to the original topic and move forward. The group I attend has many double winners (Both AA & Alanon). I am one of those too. We who are do our best to not make mention, and are successful 95-99% of the time. It usually may come up if/when someone talks about attending an open meeting of AA and has questions or if we are talking about how we got 'here' - many of us came from the other side (and then there are those who started in Al-Anon and then decided they belonged in the other too).

If you are concerned that you spoke out of turn, perhaps a quick discussion about that part makes sense for you. Beyond that, unless there appears to be more 'issues' next time, I would just attend the business/group conscious meeting and share there.

Keep coming back - great discussion!!

__________________

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene

 

 
Nana Benny


Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 5
Date:
Permalink  

Thanks everyone!  Makes me feel better.  I will attend the meeting and share my hope that our group can continue to keep the focus on ala-non 12 step work.  



__________________
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Experience, strength, and hope from seasoned members about a meeting