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AH , HAS AGAIN DRUNK HIMSELF INTO NEAR DEATH AGAIN. HE DRINKS ALOT FOR A WEEK THEN DOESNT EAT AND THROWS UP TO THE POINT OF DYHRATION. HE PASSED OUT AT WORK. NOW HE IS AGAIN IN HOSPITAL DRIVING EVERYONE CRAZY CAUSE HE CANT SMOKE AND SUDDENLY IS SO HUNGRY AND THE FOOD IS LOUSEY ETC. THIS SCENE HAS BEEN REPEATED SOO MANY TIMES. GRRRRRR
(((Alyce)) I have been there Alyce and so understand. Truth be told, I was always happy when he was in hospital and I refused to take any calls from him or visit while he was there. I would take calls from the Drs. and know that they can give him the "patch" to help the nicotine cravings.
Please take care of yourself and try to get to a meeting. Positive thoughts all around.
I feel for you. I remember near the end of me letting go. When my son called or was so bad I would just say call 911. One time getting out of the ER I told him I wouldn't come get him and he had to walk home. About 3 miles around 9pm....didn't get home until close to midnight because he was so sick coming off alcohol. It scared me to death but I had to let it happen. I was scared with the near death experiences but I learned and excepted he was going to make or he wasn't.....what was I going to do.
(((( hugs ))))
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Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth
Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.
I just wanted to say I feel for you. My AbF was averaging 3 times a week in the hospital ER and was also vomiting like you say, or in a coma, only to come out and do it again. I hope that you will be OK and have support around you.I'm very very new to al anon but came as I found the insanity , anxiety and trauma of these situations is effecting me negatively and when I saw this post I just felt so much for you and so hoping that you will be as good as you can be x
Nothing changes until something changes. Why take part in the whole thing over and over again? You have choices here. Doing the same thing over and over is our own insanity. In fact taking part in the whole thing could be enabling his disease. Try something different, dont go to the hospital, dont listen to his self pity. Do something good for you, good for your soul. What have you got to loose? unless what youve got to loose is enjoyable, no offense but I sure did enjoy my victim and martyr role. Just an idea.x
I feel for you. I could have written your post numerous times over the past 2 years. Some details different but basically the same with my late AH: medical crisis, dehydration, loss of conscoiusness, weakness, memory issues. Take him to hospital or call ambulance.
The best thing that happened was I learned from my sponsor that I did not have to go to the ER or hospital. If the doctors needed information they could call me. That reduced my stress. I had other AlAnons to talk to, and I repeated "One day at a time" a lot. Things got better when I moved him to assisted living.
The main thing I learned was I did not have to handle it alone.
I will be thinking about you.
thanks for everyones support. No, i didnt go to the hospital, a family friend took him and left him there. They kept him 1 day for fluid replacement/medicine etc. Yes, those hours he was away were heaven. i even got to get some sleep. when he is home, i am always on mental alert even if i try not to be.I would love to leave but we have serious money trouble and have to borrow to pay mortgage. yes, im tired of his patterns but am not aiding him to take his meds or leaning on him to make sure he goes to to the addiction doc they set up.
thank goodness for my alanon meetings, tonite is one.
So very sorry for your worry about your AH. So very happy that you're staying close to the program and preparing to get to a meeting.
We are here for you and you are not alone.
I too used any time they were away (hospital, jail, treatment, prison) to rebuild my mojo and get rest/sleep. By working this program and focusing on me, I am better at doing this even when they are 'free'. I do understand that worry that we live with; my only suggestion is giving it to HP and doing something special for you. If that's not happening, by all means, my second choice is something productive (clean a closet, paint a room). I tend to do better with a goal/plan than sitting idle waiting/wondering what's come next.
Please keep coming back - we're just a post away!!!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Alyce, I'm glad you have a meeting tonight. You are in a tough spot. I hope you can get some more relief, but some time in hospital does help with the chaos sometimes, I am definitely familiar with that. Continued prayers going to HP.
