The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Ok - first meeting done. Glad I did it. Felt comfortable and had a good safe place with which to share and identify. I'll certainly keep coming back.
Naturally part of this is trying to understand my own actions in the situation with her. Sometimes I feel inadequate, sometimes I feel I'm losing my sanity and sometimes I feel I'm the one with the problem. All natural feelings I'm sure. I spoke to a good friend of mine tonight who said when I was in addiction he walked away from me because he realised that his presence was having no effect whatsoever. He has no ill will towards me now but it sounds similar to where I am at with her.
The key point is that I'm doing something about it. Sounds cliche but it's living in the solution and not the problem. I even treated myself to a meal on the way home. I can sit in bed tonight, read a good book, smoke a Malboro on the terrace and sleep with some kind of peace of mind.......
Way to go Paul! Way to go.....just keep exploring the solution and don't live in the problem. When I put pen to paper, and make gratitude lists, I can tell you that I am truly blessed. It's in my head that I can twist most situations to be 'less than pleasant'.
(((Hugs))) to you - so glad you made it to the meeting!!
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Many thanks for that. I'm a great believer that it's our actions and not just our words or intents which ultimately define us. I felt I did the right thing. That's a good feeling to have.....!
((Paul))) . Good work Paul-- love how you are living in the solution, talking it over with others, seeing the reality of the disease, treating yourself to a tasty dinner, plan on relaxing. Way to go my friend.
Program has taught me that by being gentle with myself, treating myself with kindness and courtesy I have been better able to be gentle with the world.
Keep the focus on yourself, live one day at a time, let go of the past and do not project to the future and keep on taking care yourself. You are worth it.
One other thought, when you spoke about the slogan; "living in the solution."youe stated it was sort of cliché. I know I felt that way about most of the slogans early on, and now they have each become my very best program tool. They are small snippets of wisdom that stop me in my tracks and remind me of program. Glad that you're here
