The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I am going to share some of what I wrote when in the process of working the the first ten steps and thought I would start at the beginning, with Step 1:
We admitted we were powerless over the Alcoholic
that our lives had become unmanageable.
I began Step One in May of last year, it was a huge relief admitting I was powerless over AH's drinking I thought there was something wrong with me that I couldn't control the situation because AH was blaming me for everything and I believed him for 13 long years. My emotions have become so much more stable and less self conscious, I worry less about finances, my spirituality has been enhanced and I am able to get back to studying my Zen books, my relationship with my HP is much more trusting in that I realize that the hardships were lessons that were for my own good and which have helped me to become wiser and more self reliant. I am presently working on my physical and mental health, and my career and relationships with my co-workers and supervisors are much more relaxed, in spite of the industry stresses. I enjoy much more conversing everyday with co-workers and friends, gardening, my cats, reading, staying in touch with my family and MIP. I definitely feel happier after completing step one ... I feel like I have come full circle!!
Have a beautiful day everyone!
XOXO
__________________
"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it
does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart". ~ unknown
What a great post - and where better to start that at Step One.
My introduction to Step One of Alanon came when I was 'at the wall' with my oldest Son. I am a double-winner, and met/married another in recovery. And while I accepted that Alcoholism was a disease, I didn't fully admit that it was a disease of thinking and an allergy. I was out of my mind with anger, frustration, fear, uncertainty, worry and much more over my Son, and found MIP while using google for resources to cure him.
I landed at MIP, and began reading other member's stories/experiences, strength and hope. I posted and attended some online meetings, and finally found the strength and humility to go to a Face-to-Face meeting. My first meeting was OK, but my second meeting was great!!! I found a marvelous group, a great fellowship and just a lovely set of new program friends who understood me, my world, my fears and my dilemma.
Today, I too worry less, focus on me and my side of the street and work my program to the best of my ability. Many things have changed since I arrived, some for the good and some much different than expected, but with the help of the program, a great sponsor, the steps, slogans and meetings, I've been able to walk through these events knowing my HP has my back!
I am grateful for MIP, the program, the fellowship, etc. as it has saved me from an existence of uncertainty and fear.
Make it a great day!
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
"I thought there was something wrong with me that I couldn't control the situation
because AH was blaming me for everything and I believed him for 13 long years."
Definitely same here... that's why I like this group: you all can understand.
For me that probably went on for two years or less, though, and soon after
that the divorce papers were filed. I feel fortunate to have limited exposure
to only that long but divorce is certainly not a happy road by any means...
at least not yet.