The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My AH really hit bottom (which I think is bottom but really it isn't my business and he really needs to decide if it is or not) this week. On Monday he stayed home from work and proceeded to drink the entire day. He doesn't remember anything and just passed out. The scary part for me was that he was driving around but again that is nothing I can control. Yesterday I called a family friend who came down to talk to him and he literally cried the entire day. Today he was too sick from withdrawals to go to work and was throwing up in the parking lot of the train station. My heart is just so heavy for him as he was so low on the phone and finally admitted he really hadn't committed to recovery before this. I just feel so sad for him and really trying to focus on myself but it is so so hard. How do you not get sucked into the drama when a guy who never shows emotions is crying saying he is sick and needs to get help.
Hi Jazzie this is indeed a very difficult, heart wrenching disease, and I can understand your question. Al-Anon ask us to detach with love and show compassion and understanding for anyone suffering from this dreadful disease.
What I needed to learn was how to show compassion, empathy,and kindness, while maintaining my boundaries and taking care of myself. Al-Anon gave me those tools, which meant that I focused on myself, knowing that I was powerless over people places and things, and offering program tools to anyone in pain. Praying for people is also a great gift you can give.
Prayers and positive thoughts for you and your family
My ex did that a lot,He would cry and moan about his life and his problems,but he wouldn't do anything to change it.We became intertwined in a merry go round of tears, and promises to change and going right back to drinking and drugging and ,Crisis after crisis. I can't tell you what to do ,but for me it was too exhausting to just keep going through it.I also hit a bottom emotionally from dealing with it and that is when I decided to change.I picked up the phone and called a crisis line because I was suicidal,my depression was so bad.I started seeing a therapist and she suggested I go to meetings and it has changed my life.
