The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The ODA T reading for April 13 speaks about the slogan One Day at a Time. It reinforces the idea that much of our precious time is wasted fretting over past mistakes, missed opportunities and what might happen in the future.
The reading points out that yesterday has no value except as experiences, to be used in making today and the future more pleasant.
I like the reminder which states that if we have regrets for the past because we hurt someone we can let go of that regret by doing, a kindness whenever we are able and regrets for missed opportunities can be erased by trying to make wiser decisions going forward.
The quote is a powerful prayer.; "I pray to be relieved of the compulsion to worry about the past, and that I may not let my pessimism paint black pictures of what may happen tomorrow". "Keep in mind we can live only in the present and that all the rest of life is in the past or uncertain.".
I always did believe the philosophy, of living in the present, one day at a time but I didn't have the tools to enable myself to do so. Living one day at a time, letting go of thoughts of the past and fear of the future was a true gift of this program. Working the steps, learning to keep the focus on myself, eliminating blame, judgment and criticism, all helped in this process.
There is a reading in the Courage to Change that states the only time, that change can occur is if we're in the present. I strive to stay in the present one day at a time. The principles of this program saved my sanity and life
Thank you for sharing and posting hotrod. I have a close friend who recently came to Alanon; she and I have talked several times about the difference between looking at events of the past in order to learn from them, and wallowing in the events of the past in order to stay and try to fix them. I notice in myself that if I am talking about something that happened already and am feeling those old feelings of anxiety, bitterness, anger--I am wallowing.
I am grateful for the tools and support surrounding me that help me live in today.
I like this reading. Whenever i feel that uncomfortable feeling then my mind is usually in the past or in the future. Ive got to bring myself back into the moment. The past cant be changed, i can choose not to feel how i felt way back then.. I am done with being a victim and as soon as im back in the past staring im putting myself in the victim role again. So no, i refuse to do it for long.
Sometimes the future gets a hold of me, the what ifs, the imagined doom scenes play out like a movie sometimes. The arrogant thing about it is its never caused by me.lol. the doom scene involves others but never me. Not sure what that says about me. The funny thing is that the future imagined crisis is based on evidence gathered from the past. Lol. So im living in the future fuelled by the past to be miserable in the present. In yoga, its the breath that bringsus back to the moment. Concentrate on the inhale and exhale, it seems to work.
I love this reading today. I always need to be reminded that I must only live in today. My sponsor always says to me,"B, FOR TODAY, what does it look like? What can you do TODAY to make things more manageable?" Just so important because none of us is guaranteed tomorrow.
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Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be!
