The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
This weekend was hard. My sister situation is hers but very painful for me to think the pain she is going through. But I am the outside and I am the one who can see everything. But like me and my situation. I love my husband. She is staying with her husband even though he is cheating for the kids. I have to learn to detach and keep distance until she can help her self in some where. I put myself in a bad situation by hanging with my sister and her husband girlfriend. I let my guard down and it hurt me. I didn't spend time online so they didn't help. I have no start to work my support system and I am feeling better.
We like to control and fix people. we hate to see people suffer. that is true that we all having problems but i have to learn to let go like we do for each other. i hope the co-worker eats ur donut. that would be great. i am going to start constrticon and put my guard back up. Take stands not to put myself in this spot. like u wanted to take there pain away. the one that is getting divorce too. it is hard to watch someone suffer. but we have been there you an i and we made friend with each other an set up a support system. i can't do it alone. i have tried that before and that did not work. that is why i am talking to people because i have my support group to help me work on detaching. because there is nothing we can do for our sister because the more we tell them they will deny it or give us some kind of reason that they believe in there head and heart to be true. and if u believe something hard enough it is true to u and not to other people. what we can see being an outsidee they can not see. like with our husband people saw things that we didn't see but it took us a while to come to terms with ourself.
-- Edited by nycbt at 13:54, 2006-02-21
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Hey everyone watch me grow. I go thru good & bad times. each day i am getting stronger.
Thiis building up stuff is real. we are here for one another. it is so hard to watch others in pain. We want to take it from them. But we need to take care of us first. I have learned that here. You and everyone here has helped me see that. That is where the building up comes from. We cant even see each other, but we have this care for one another. You have that too. You can build your sister up just by being with her and letting her see your love. no words needed she knows where here life is right now. She may just need a hug or encouraging words. That is building up. Be honest with her and yourself. If you dont feel comfortable in a situation tell her. She should respect you for it. But most of all let her know you love her. Well I will keep you and your family in my prayers. God answers them I do believe. Sometimes in his own ways. We just have to be still and listen