The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
For the past few years Ive had a very hardened NEGATIVE attitude towards everything - people, places, things, etc etc.
How do I work on getting rid of this attitude and being more positive? At least to learn to keep my mouth shut! I would a happier person if I wasnt so Negative all the time. HELPPPPPPPPPPP
I wish I had an answer for you.I'm feeling much the same as you lately. Angry short tempered and not very tolerant. It seems I've gone from allowing myself to be walked on, insulted etc. to being the opposite. All I can hope for is finding a happy medium soon.
You are not alone in the way you feel. I've been writing much down and it seems to help me vent and get rid of some of my feelings. Wishing you strength and a bit of peace.
Letting go of the anger was the key for me. It opened a whole new world of possibilities to see things differently. As to how I was able to do it. I finally surrendered myself and my life to a power greater than myself. Finally believed that alone I could not do it. I asked god everyday for release from the anger and bitterness that I felt for so long. It worked. Turning it all over and not expecting anything in return made the world of difference.
Good Luck
karen
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Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care. Love you all!
Karen
Wow,Karen,thanks for your post. I've been struggling with the same issue for the last eight years as a result of being involved with my ex A.
As I became more and more aware of her lies and deceit,I became more and more angry and bitter. Now,it's hard to shake it. But thanks to your post I can start turning it over to God. Fortunately,I have a strong faith. And I plan to start acting on that today.
Something just occurred to me;there's a saying in AA,"Act as if". I think I'll apply that as I turn this over.
"Act as if..." Another way of saying this is "Fake it till you make it". Behave like a happy and healthy person, even if your heart isn't really in it. Eventually some of that healthy behaviour - keeping your mouth shut, taking care of yourself, chosing the healthy path - becomes more familiar, and isn't such a stretch.
I also find it very helpful to stay in the moment - not to let myself go off on those internal tirades. Think about what I am doing, not what others should be doing.
I know this is not Al-Anon literature, but I have found the book written about happiness by the Dalai Lama to be very helpful to me. I have learned that nothing good can come out of being negative, towards yourself or others. Self-fulfilling prophecies happen, so prophecise in a positive direction.
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**Everyone is doing the best they can from day to day**
