The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go </OA_HTML/ibeCCtpItmDspRte.jsp?item=1271>.
Owning Our Power
We need to make a distinction between powerlessness and owning our power.
The first step in recovery is accepting powerlessness. There are some things we can't do, no matter how long or hard we try. These things include changing other people, solving their problems, and controlling their behavior. Sometimes, we feel powerless over ourselves - what we feel or believe, or the effects of a particular situation or person on us.
It's important to surrender to powerlessness, but it's equally important to own our power. We aren't trapped. We aren't helpless. Sometimes it may feel like we are, but we aren't. We each have the God given power, and the right, to take care of ourselves in any circumstance, and with any person. The middle ground of self-care lies between the two extremes of controlling others and allowing them to control us. We can walk that ground gently or assertively, but in confidence that it is our right and responsibility.Let the power come to walk that path.Today, I will remember that I can take care of my self. I have choices, and. I can exercise the options I choose without guilt.
rosie__________i am POWERLESS over the effects of the incest and mental/emotional abuse....i am powerless over the things i learned in order to survive....the need to control to not feel helpless.....the compusive fantasizing.....the fear my needs won't be met......i am POWERLESS.....however, i am not trapped anymore.....as a helpless child i was HELPLESS and defenseless.... now i am only POWERLESS......i now have the GOD given POWER to take care of me.......i can take CARE of me, and i do have CHOICE, as opposed to my past.....how does a child take care of themself??? how does a child have choice???? they cannot and don't!!! thus the feelings of helplessness, adn the feeling "i won't get out of this".....the **learned helplessness** i was afflicted with over my being in his trap--totally dominated and used for his pleasure NOW???? i can take care of me in ANY situation!!! ----i have CHOICE.....and i am excercising that self CARE and that CHOICE....practice of this i know will ease my fears of "not getting my instinctual needs met".....which are probably the **root** of my fear
