The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
There have been people that come in to the room and are angry but they take it out on people in the room and i don't think that is right. It is hard to help someone that is so angry. I feel the whole room gets angry because of the person and I really don't think people need for people to be getting mad. We come to the room for peace to get out of the yelling and the angry to a peaceful room. So I don't feel people should be allowed to get away with things like shouting at people. I am venting because i feel it is not right on what happens.
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Hey everyone watch me grow. I go thru good & bad times. each day i am getting stronger.
I was angry too when I first went in, maybe not at other people, but angry. So many of us have been so frustrated with alcoholism that it comes out in all kinds of ways. No, people shouldn't be angry with others in the room, but if they are fairly new to the program they are likely angry at the world.
I have had my own share of resentments in there, but I have to assume that the person is sick and needs further recovery. It's not always new people either. People carry thier stuff with them for a long time.
If someone is being disruptive though, you can PM them and ask them to stop or try to get them to talk to you about what is bothering them. If you are ignored and the disruption continues, you can boot them and they can come back later. The best thing for other chatroom members to do is to not engage.
Christy
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If we think that miracles are normal, we will expect them. And expecting a miracle is the surest way to get one.
I am sorry if something said in chat has made you feel upset.
Sometimes, I used to feel that everyone was there to have a laugh - now, I realise, if I feel down, I can just speak, and people always willing to listen. Now, sometimes I am the one having a laugh and joke -I am grateful to feel this way, but, if someone is troubled, I will always listen.
I dont know what happened - try to bear in mind we are all recovering, at our own pace. Also, from time to time, I have regretted things I said in chat - it is so easy to press that "enter" button!!!
Hi.. I can understand what you are saying about the anger in the room.. However i also go into another alanon chat room and it is there too.. I try not to let my anger out when i am in the room.. However for me these rooms are the only safe place i can.. This program is the only place i can.. I used to take to heart everything that everyone said in the room and if they were angry and put it in my direction then i took that too.. However since having the job i did till just thins past week i learned to let the people be angry and let them be who they are.. we all have alot of emotions spirling in us daily and some of us (me included) do not always handle them or deal with them in the right way maybe.. However its the only way we know how to at that time.. Rather we are new or not.. If you have seen my last post you know i am not handleing things well and i take great comfort in knowing i can come here or i the room and let known whatever i am feeling and no matter what it is i can get the encouragement, strength and hope of those in there.. It does not matter what i say or what i feel.. I never get told its worng.. instead i get support of others and if i am really luck someone to hear me and to help me maybe find the rigth way to handle or deal with things.. Before i came to this program almost 2 years ago i was always ragefull.. i would do things to hurt myself.. like hitting tress, bridges, brick walls.. anything that would hurt me and punish me more for what i was feeling.. since being in this program i am not saying i so not still get to this point or do not do this.. however today it is so far and in between.. because i know i can come here and be me.. Something i never had before alanon.. I know its hard to see someone with so much anger and have them show it to others.. however i learned that was more about me then them.. and dont get me worng i am not saying that is the case with you.. so please do not take any of this the wrong way.. i also have a hard time with someone else anger.. especially if i am not in a good place myself.. Hope none of this upset you hun.. Because that would be the last thing i would ever want to do.. you have your feelings and they are never wrong.. you feel what you are surpossed to feel.. and nobody can take that away.. love and hugs to you hun..
I know a bit of what may have prompted you to post this I would like to say a few things in hopes to maybe comfort you.
This afternoon’s incident may have been teenagers home from school and just playing a mean hearted joke –heck maybe adults (young ones) You have the isp’s of them, if they should come back and ‘try’ to make others uncomfortable again they will be recognized. Yes – I agree with other replies,some come and need to rant, vent and/or some do it to cause an argument, the ‘dump and leave’
We are a ‘recovery’ room, there are many success stories, our chat room serves as a home group to many.
I prefer to think of all the good rather then the few bad glitches that may happen. Thank heaven you were there and thank you for your service. I know op’ing may be difficult as service work, for which I am grateful for your time and dedication in keeping the room a safe place for all. Also -I can not control another, I am not that powerful –who can ever tell what someone is about to write? Please do not let a bad instance or two discourage you. From what I have seen you have done such a wonderful job for being rather new at op’ing.
Let go and let God, One Day at a time and most of all know you did your best. Then I would apply take what you like and leave the rest. Say the Serenity Prayer as needed. You can only do what you can do, no more no less.
maybe my last post to this was miss understood, or not i don't know.
i say what i see if i feel the need, and i did so i did.
i was there when this took place, and weather it was people taking the pi** or not i can't say.
maybe it comes from being british i don't know, but i understood it to be someone looking for a bit of help and not being the center of attention when doing so, so they lashed out at the nearest thing...us. wrong yes but if all that was said is/was ture then understandable.
maybe there was more read into this than there needed to be or maybe not enough be me???
dunno, don't really care to be honest...
puts me in mind of the saying...(storm in a teacup!)
i said what i saw and posted what i thought.
if it isn't to the like or tast of other then sorry but thats me.
flumpy, aka, crazykate..
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Life is like a box of chocolates....Sometimes it get's sticky!!
