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Hi Everyone! Just want to share with you that I survived my Al-Anon lead! It was a leap, for sure, because I hadn't done one in about twenty years, and haven't heard any specifically Al-Anon leads--only AA and NA. It felt like doing all the steps at once! Admitting all the unmanageability of my life before Al-Anon, relying very much on a HIgher Power to get me through this one, making amends indirectly to others and directly to myself, taking inventory of my issues and problems, sharing with others, taking the message to others, etc etc--I have to tell you, it is a very powerful and empowering thing to do!
I had to laugh at myself! I spent hours and hours writing about my life, and then trying to boil it down to a manageable amount of material for the time (40 mins), and then making headings and cards and all sorts of stuff! It was still far too much! I read it all the night before and it took me two hours! I worried about what to do. But when the time came, I just stood up and started talking! Didn't even glance at the folder full of stuff! It was really liberating. I was able to connect with the audience, and the attention and the support was terrific! I got lots of hugs afterwards, and (interestingly enough) encouragement to write my story! I didn't tell them I already had!
I'm sharing all this because I want to encourage those of you who have been in the program for a while to consider doing a lead! It's such a freeing thing to do, and so helpful for people to hear--especially for those who are still struggling with horrible situations and feeling hopeless or confused. If you feel you have gained some strength and insight from working the Al-Anon program, you are ready to give a lead! Besides all that, it's a wonderful way to give back for all the help and support we receive from others! Like any other worthwhile risk or challenge in life, you'll be SO glad you did!
I need clarification. I attend a very small Alanon group. What is an Alanon lead? Does this happen at a meeting or a conference? I listen to AA/Alanon speaker tapes. Is this the same thing? These are so helpful to me.
Hi Nancy! Yes, perhaps I needed to explain more for those who might not know what a "lead" is. It's a meeting that, after all the usual preliminaries of the steps and so on, is given over to one person's story. You tell how it was for you before you got into recovery, what happened that brought you into the program, and how things have been for you since then. It can happen in small or large groups. My own experience has been with fairly large groups, because once it's known that someone is willing to give a lead, word goes out and more people than usual are likely to be there because it IS an event for all concerned. But I don't mean to make it sound so intimidating or difficult. It should be a regular occurrence. The group I gave my lead for is not the one I usually attend. I was asked by someone in my home group who also attends the bigger group, and I was invited to give it there. This group has a "lead" meeting every last Tuesday of the month. But each group can set it up however they want to. There are no hard and fast rules. Just that it's set up enough in advance that people will know about it. For the person giving the lead, you just follow that basic guideline of "how it was, what happened, and how it is now" sort of shape.
There's probably some info about leads in the literature somewhere, but I can't offhand point to anything there. It's always been by invitation, in my particular case, but I'm sure it's also OK to just volunteer!
Just hearing you talk about your lead makes me motivated :) I wonder if you cold give a shorter version here on the baord for us? I think that would be great and really wonderful to help all of us here. Congratulations on working so hard with your program and passing it on. cdb :)
Wow! Thanks for asking, cdb! I can't do it right now because I'm at work--but I'll see if I can create a really short version and post it here in the next day or so--it being the weekend an' all.
Awsome job! I am so proud of you. You are extremely inspirational... not that I am up to that point yet but if I were watch out world!
I am so glad you found it freeing and powerful. I give thanks to people who are corageous enough to share their story. I have only heard that at our Anniversary meeting. It really was an incredible thing to listen to. To me I was amazed how much I had in common with one of the stories and how much closer I felt to the speakers after their story.
Thank you so much for sharing both here and at your meeting. I admire your strength and look forward to both reading your story and talking to you again.
I have actually always liked speaker meetings a lot. I have only once been to an al-anon conference and i liked that too. I must say you made a lot of preparation (not everyone does) and I think that probably contributed to how good it was for you.
I will have to try to seek out those meetings. I know when I have gone to online meetings that the one's I actually enjoyed the most were speaker meetings.
