The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I will be heading out next week for some time alone to make my final decision, although I think I it is pretty much being made for me every day in his actions. Please pray that I won't be selfish and that I will think of all envolved in this decision to stay or go. It has been nearly a year and this is the closest I have felt that leaving will be the right thing to do, no matter how hard it will on all of us. I will be in touch with friends from MIP by phone but won't be online most of the week. Love to All, Josey
__________________
Julianne - It's best to move on. You cannot look back in anger in life. It's too short
My thoughts are with you. Deciding when the right time to leave is never easy. Quite some time ago I found this article that has helped me immensely with this decision in my life. Obviously, if there is violence going on it changes this. Those of us who have lived with this disease have such a difficult time with trying to figure out the right things. I hope this helps.
How do you know when it's the right time to leave a relationship?
When you're lonelier with the person than you would be alone. Which is why it's so screamingly important to learn to be happy alone before you tie yourself to someone. You need to have that point to be able to judge a relationship soundly.
If the issue is whether a broken relationship can be fixed or not, look at the traits, in both of you, that are making things difficult. Now be honest about which of those will ever change. (Hint: if they've been the same all along or at least since the initial buzz wore off, then assume they'll never change.)
For example, he's not affectionate, never has been, but you think hey, how hard could it be for him to give me the occasional hug, since that's all I really need?
ANK, bad thinking. Consider it impossible for him. Assume he will never be more affectionate than he is now, and then decide if you can be happy with him as he is.
Karen
__________________
Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care. Love you all!
Karen
Not very good at the prayers bit - just to let you know, you are in my heart, and my thoughts. You have given me lots of strength and comfort here, and in chat..... wishing you the very best - you deserve no less.