When  I first meet my husband I didn't want to leave his side for any amount of time. I would call him all the time. He would do his stuff drink/drug I thought if I would give him attention that he would stop doing all the nonsense. Well then I went on depression meds some work some didn't I wanted to change who I was so I got alot of piercing stomach, nose and some more. I thought maybe I deserve the pain because I was doing something wrong. I dyed my hair maybe he would change. No changing. Well I have continue to take my depression meds which have helped me.

Then I came to alanon online and then face to face and then after some time I was able to leave his side. I was still calling all the time in the begin. I was going to the program for a while and then he stop drinking so I thought I didn't need the program any more. So I slowly stop going, here and there I would go.

I got a sponsor in March and started to go more often then I was in the begin. After a while I was getting comfortable not being around him 24/7. The only time I was away was when  I had to go to work or the doctor/parnets for my meds.

Todays day I have been able to go without calling him for more time. I spend time with out him and don't feel guilty about it. It took some time but I was able to do it. I have now have a great sponsor who is online but has helped me alot. I also have a awsome friend that I meet here in these rooms who has helped me so much.

So if you are just starting out in the program give the program a try. As they say keep an open mind and u will learn  from other people. In the begin I didn't want to go to face to face I thought the internet was fine and they push me into going to a face to face meeting which was good I need the push. I am happy they did it. I have built a great support system that is very strong and very helpful to have. So I suggest if ur new get a sponsor and set up a good support system that will understand u.