The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My father called me yesterday. He had a question about earthquakes. There have been a lot of those lately, he reminds me. Perhaps I should consider moving out of the earthquake prone zone I live in. Obviously, the earth is in some unstable state, and if it can happen somewhere else, it can happen to me. Didn't I like the east coast? They don't have earthquakes.
This reminded me of a call I got earlier in the year from my brother. North Korea has missles that can reach California, he told me. Perhaps I should consider moving out of the range of North Korean missles, he suggested.
Then my mother called me this morning. She had heard about a spinal injury that shared some symptoms with what I had been experiencing this last week. The person she had heard about had become quite suddenly paralyzed and would be wheelchair bound for the rest of her life. Just FYI, she said, and hung up.
These conversations have driven me nuts in the past, and they still can if I let them. Truth be told, I too worry about everything, if I let myself. These random things included. I just choose not to, most of the time. Except when I am overexposed to them, and they win out. Like could happen next week.
Next week I'm going to visit family for the holidays, the first time in six years. After talking with my mother this morning, the thought of spending quality time with this bunch of overt worrywarts has me anxious. It's easy enough to hang up the phone when I'm out here. Quite another to avoid some conversations entirely while I'm there.
So, I prayed about how to handle this this morning, and I was surprised to suddenly remember a conversation I had with my dog's obedience class teacher a few years ago. The teacher told me the reason my dog wouldn't walk next to me is because she didn't believe I was in charge. She needed to be up there in front, checking everything out, dragging me down the street, protecting both of us. When she learned I was in charge, she would stop, she said. And she did.
Now I try to think of my relationship with my Higher Power the same way. When I realize He is in charge, I'll stop dragging us all down the street. Same for my family, I guess. They're not there yet, but I'm on my way. Keeping that in mind next week will help me a lot, I think.
hi Kristen I'm going to remember the obedience teacher. I struggled with getting my dog to behave (partly because I was worried about manipulating him LOL) and learned so much from my trainer. That's a good one.
Remember your progress - awesome - as you visit your family. Have a good trip.
Have a safe trip next week. you aren't flying, driving, going by bus, boat or plane are you?
I hate going to my mother's house because my step-father is so negative. he always has a story to top yours and wants to give tons of advice. he will tell you "I've been there, done that and got the T-shirt to prove it." He's older so of course he's been through a lot. I have learned to tell him to hush and quit being so negative. I finally asked him one day "Don't you think I'd come visit more often if I didn't haev to put up with this?" It worked, but he needs constant reminders. Sometimes I am able to turn the tables using humor.
Have a good week, a safe trip and a wonderful holiday. It will be okay
