Hi,

I cant tell you if you should or shouldnt leave your A but I do know what a little bit of time dealing with mine has done to me over the past two months.  About writing him a letter - after reading many of these posts on this site - I agree with alot that is said.  The drug is what is controlling them, so writing a letter may not get through to him as well as you would think it would.  I have thought about it so many times, write a letter, tell him how I feel about this, how hurt I am, how mad I am, how he destroyed something so amazing and wonderful.  But what would that do - the pills make them feel good no matter what is going on in their lives so the letter may fall on deaf ears.  I couldnt fully understand what power the stupid painkillers had on people and why they would start treating people who they outwardly loved and respected like they didnt even remember they existed and they didnt care about them.  So I took some of my own painkillers for a day with the soul purpose of understanding what it would feel like to not care.  I didnt - I was happy, sedated, didnt care about anything much at all.  My phone would ring and I had no interest in even answering to find out who it was.  I could see WHY a person with an addiction would like that feeling.  A normal person can make themselves feel like that when they want to - but someone with an addiction relies on that pill to make them smile and laugh and be happy.  So I took the pill bottle and flushed them down the toilet - those damn things can ruin your freaking life and EVERYTHING around you.

Twopoodles - I cant tell you either decision you make will be easy - they both will tear you apart - but do what is good for YOU.  He isnt worrying about taking care of you - so dont worry about taking care of him - take care of YOU.

Cyn