The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
last night i looked over my diary from over the past two years. the only stuff i ever wrote in it was all the lousy stuff my a did to me and how lousy i felt and how my life was so wrong. the thoughts of when i was suicidal. basically the whole thing was written about my a and how i let everything he ever did make me miserable. so i sat down, relived those moments and thoughts by reading them. then one by one i ripped each page up and threw it all up. i said this is the past. im letting it all go now. im moving on. so now i can not go back and read about the miserable times. that is one less place i can go to relive my horrible past. i am trying to recover now. starting a new journal. this journal may have notes of hurt and venting of my a but it will also have notes about me and my gratitudes, blessings, achievements, improvements. it will help me not hinder me. ty
notsonew1111
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stay in the now...dont look forward, dont look back....your life is what you make of it
Good for you. I have many notebooks with my journal entries. My project will be to do the same as you and rip those pages up. I know when I read my journals it is also all about "him" and ain't it just awful. I guess it served it's purpose but now it is time for me to move on.
I have colored pencils, glue, scotch tape, etc. I draw in color, cut pictures out, write outside the lines, and write down quotes that speak to me. I list my gratitudes and there are many. I have started my 4th step with resentments and fears (this is harder). But also with my 4th step I list my accomplisments like figuring out the computer by myself, driving home at night and I have a list of people who have been nice or helpful to me like the woman who saved my place in line and a friend that sent me flowers. This helps me so much to put the focus on me and my recovery.
I too have kept a diary or journal from since I can remember. I too look back and read and sometimes wonder wow I have come a long way since then, I too like to let it go but for me I have a burning ritual. I light candles and burn the pages in the wood stove. Has proved to be very good healing for me. I have not always kept my books up to date. I sometimes find it hard to find the "quite" time i need to write. But I did just today buy a brand new journal a really nice one that I picked out at winners and will take with me to my retreat this weekend.
Aron 
