The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Thanks to all that replied it always makes me feel better when I read them. It took me so long to write this because I was home for a week for my fathers 80th birthday. It was nice and he was really pleased.
I just feel so fustrated all the time. I always feel tormented. As you all know it hurts so much. It's bad enough with your husband but your daughter is almost unbearable at times. I try to let go but some things I have to do like pay her bank payments and lot rent because it's in our name. We got the mobile home for her thinking it would be good for her to have her own place and not be renting from her EX. 've made up my mind not to pay her heat and lights or buy food.
With this last bout her EX refuses to pay her alimony, he says she don't deserve it and she's not worth it. He wouldn't bring the kids up for Halloween for her to see them he said he'd send her pictures. We went to the lawyer to see if he could do this, he didn't think so but she needed her agreement papers they signed but she can't find them where she had moved. She won't have them for Christmas, just in the afternoon. She had 2 jobs which she quit and can't get her pay. Her first Ex turned on her because she tied his dog on a lease and it got away,(He's always freaking out and burned out himself from drugs)although he says he's clean now. He phone her Ex husband and everyone he could think of and said everything about her, said she drank and doing drugs all the time. I'm not picking up for her but a lot of things he said was not true and it was said out of spite.
She talks to a lady, Lynn, who was trying to help her when all this started and represented her in court for her DWI my daughter calls her when things happen and she even said she has never seen anything like this before how these two men are so hateful toward her and always on her back for everything she does and is always saying mean things to her. Lynn called my daughters Ex's lawyer and wanted to know what was going on that their client was refusing to pay her alimony, wouldn't let her see the kids and was verbalbly abusive to her on the phone, they said they would talk to him but we haven't heard nothing back yet. It like nothing ever goes along smooth, there are always little things holding things up, like not being able to find her papers, having to pay her rent because she can't get paid.
I'm sorry for going on and on. Please God it will all be okay one of these days and things will be happy and normal everyday life again.
My heart goes out to you. I cannot imagine that pain that you are completely powerless over. Keep coming and keep posting and I pray things will improve for your daughter.
Maria123
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If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
You're right, it is extremely painful to watch a child suffer the effects of addiction. It's hard to watch anyone we love go through this but with a child it's even harder because no matter how old they are, they're still *our* children.
Sometimes when it seems as if everything that could go wrong for our addicted loved ones, IS going wrong, we consider that a bad thing. That's not always necessarily the case. Sometimes it's their Higher Power working in their lives. During times like this it's most important that we stay out of the way and let things happen the way they are supposed to. That's not always the way *we* think they're supposed but that's ok. That's where let go and let God comes into play.
You shared a lot about what's going on in your daughters life......but not much about you. How are YOU doing? How was your dads birthday celebration?
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Kathy S --
~*I trust my Higher Power that I am exactly where I am supposed to be in my life today.*~
