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I posted my update on the original thread, but I think it got lost! Just wanted to share w/those that were following my weekend plans.
Here it is....
Well we went out last night..went to dinner. Nice lil' place that serves good cajun food in town. I was excited to spend some "alone" time w/my A., w/out the kids. The food was great, the company quiet. We hardly spoke anything to each other. It wasn't for a lack of trying on my part though. I would try to initiate a conversation and he apparently either didn't want to or didn't know how to participate. It was a lonely dinner to say the least. I sat there at one point when I was eating my dinner thinking if this was a first date w/someone, I wouldn't be going on a second one.
It is just so hard to be with someone who doesn't smile, doesn't laugh, doesn't talk. He sat there watching the football game on the television screen and eating his meal.
I even made the comment during the course of our two hours together that it is strange that we can't find anything to talk about. He didn't say anything. :O(
I had kept my plans to go to the concert that evening (which I am soooo glad that I did otherwise we would have come home early and I would have spent the evening by myself) and he dropped me off at where the limo was picking my group up at. He gave me a quick kiss g'bye and said to enjoy myself. Then off he went.
I get out of the car to find myself surrounded by friends who greeted me w/hugs and we spent the evening laughing and giggling.
When I met my husband years ago he was sooooooooo outgoing (and sober working a Program). He was a real people person and that attracted me so much to him (because I am the same way). He had the most gorgeous smile and infectious laugh.
When he dropped his meetings and then started dropping friends that were working the AA Program he started to withdraw into himself. Then when he started back drinking he all of a sudden was the life of the party again-only to the point of being obnoxious. Now he is dry, not going to meetings, not having any contact w/any of our Program friends (not taking his inventory here..just reality) and he seems so unhappy. I miss his smile, his laugh. I miss playing and enjoying life w/him. Nothing seems to make him happy...especially not spending time w/me.
Hi I am sorry things aren't working out for you. I do hate when I with someone and they seem to care move about other things then you. At that time you need to take care of your self. What do u want to do in the minute. You could walk to the bathroom.
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Hey everyone watch me grow. I go thru good & bad times. each day i am getting stronger.
Sometimes I start talking to myself OR I start humming a song in my head! LOL
I want to spend time w/my A. But I know his limitations, or at least I am seeing them. So I am making sure to surround myself w/friends and try to get out of the house (I run a home daycare) at least once a week and enjoy myself.
Gotta fill that bucket somehow. My sponsor said it is like going to the hardware store for bread (when it comes to expecting my A., to meet some of my needs) LOL
Relatively newbie here so beware of my comments. Heheheh. My a wife and I went out to dinner a few weeks ago. We got in the car to leave that evening and I realized she was drunk. Somehow though it didn't bother me like it once would have. I guess maybe two things were at play. One I have finally accepted that she is an a. And two, I try to have no, or least minimal, expectations.
