Hello Again , Thanks to everyone who replied to my first post , your help and advice was greatly appreciated , especially Tom . I'm off to my first meet on Monday in Limassol ... a 30 minute drive away but the way i'm feeling i'd drive for 3 hours to hear someone tell me i'm not on my own and can recover from all this . Reading the posts on here has certainly made me realise that i have been handling the whole situation the wrong way , when i thought i was doing the right thing ...... no more hiding the bottles , pouring away the drink , shouting , pleading , crying .....all fell on deaf ears . Since i posted my first message i no longer give in to the pleas for a drink , the emotional blackmail , the threat of my A becoming really ill if he doesn't get a drink down him at that moment (isn't he already ill ?) .For the last 2 yrs i have been the enabler , i've worked without a holiday just to keep a roof over my childrens heads , my A has managed to work about 4 or 5 months in those 2 years and really cant understand what's changed ....... i have in a tiny way , but already he's noticed . I know i have a long way to go , but for now if he wants to drink then i wont try to stop him but i wont provide it for him .......i feel he's lucky to be living in my house .......god knows i've tried to get him to leave , which he has done from time to time only to appear worse for wear , now i realise forcing him doesn't work , nor does asking him to attend the AA meetings here .......like you say .....only he can stop but has to want to do it for himself .

                                                        bye for now , cyta