The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Just when I start feeling like I am doing it, making good choices, and moving forward, then I hear something about my "A", and the rollercoaster starts all over again!
The Pastor friend that staged the intervention with me, heard from my "A", via email. He asked for forgiveness for his anger and said that he was praying about things.
I was forwarded a copy of the email.
I have hope that he is serious and wants to get help, but it also hurts alot, and I don't want to know anything about him at this point.
I believe he asked for forgiveness because our friend has something he wants, he is still trying to figure out away of getting it. I on the other hand have out lived my usefulness to him, and have been replaced.
So, is it ok, I mean really ok, to feel ballistically angry at him right now, inspite of the fact that he is sick, and this is not his normal behavior?
I have alot of guilt about it, he never once said he was sorry to me, or asked my forgiveness.
Sometimes we have to be reminded to do something nice for ourselves. Treat yourself nicely during this hard time. Hang in there, do daily meditations, they always seem to help me.
