The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
A couple of Tuesday ago my husband told me he was going to the bank and he didn't come back until 6:00 am. I was so upset I was up all night. I called and text message him to come home. He didn't answer the phone. I was so upset. I had no idea where he was. When I saw him I was happy to see him but very angry as well. I wanted to know why he went out and why didn't he call me and tell me if he was ok. He was gone for 12 hours.
The way I handled it was better then I used to. I didn't throw glass, didn't cut my arms. The only thing I didn't was cry of course and call my mom. Which I did kept her up which I sorry about, but I was going nuts about what happen to him. I didn't take more meds which I would of used to they are tranzilers. So I was able to handle it on my regualr dose.
For a while after that he disappeared I been very afraid that he is going to do it again. I have tried not to think of the worst. He told me he was sleeping in a local park. I don't know how true that is. I know he wasn't with any one else. The day has been a myster. I problary will never know what happen that day.
He did go back to his meetings which is good. So I am trying not to bring up the issue about it. But it is very hard.
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Hey everyone watch me grow. I go thru good & bad times. each day i am getting stronger.
My "A" disapears all night sometimes to. My "A" does this when he uses meth. He is sometimes gone for a 24 hour period, without a phone call. When this happens, I take care of me. I come here and vent through a post, I go into the chat room and talk with people who can help me get my head on straight again, I call my sponsor or someone else in the program is she isn't available, and I leave him be. I stop calling him, I know when he is in that state he doesn't care if I am worried about him or not, he is so far gone at that piont he has no cares.
I take care of me, that is all I can do. I say a prayer for him and know that my "A" is in the hands of his HP.
If you ever need to chat, I am here to listen.
Much Love,
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"Today's problems can not be solved if we still think the way we did when we created them" -Albert Einstein
