HOW DO YOU STAY STRONG??? - Al-Anon Family Group

princess433 · Veteran Member

HOW DO YOU STAY STRONG???

Dolphin123 · ~*Service Worker*~

Meg,

The only help I can offer is my experience, strength, and hope.

When I need to cry. I let myself cry. I find a place away from my "A" and let it all out. Sometimes I am with my sponsor, alanon friends, or just by myself. Sometimes I come to this board crying. I know that it is not good for me to keep the feelings in, so i find healthy ways to let them out.

When I want to yell and scream I so the same thing. I go away from my "A" and go to someone I trust to let the feelings out.

When I want to just hit my "A" because I am so full of rage. I go into my room and hit a pillow.

Sweetie, there is no quick fix that I can offer you. Just keep reaching out like you have been. We are here for you. You have a whole lota peole who care about you. Keep coming back. We are here for ya.

Much Love,

FoggyMac · Member

I am sorry you're having to experience all of this, as if being a teen isn't hard enough. I try to tell myself that I cannot be responsible for the behavior of others and am in no way to blame for the behavior of another. Easier said than done, I know. Just keep reminding yourself, "I am me and not my mother. I am responsible for my behavior and not my mother's." Repeat it over and over until it sinks in. At least, that's what I'm trying to do with my husband. I, too, and probably everyone else on this board is embarassed by their A's behavior. Best thoughts and hugs for you. Use what ever tools you can to cope. Be kind to yourself.

abbyal · ~*Service Worker*~

Princess , your so young to have to deal with those feelings , don't let other people tell u who and what u are. walk away. Have u tried to find an alateen meeting in your area that would help u alot. Young people like yourself who will understand exactly how your feeling and can share thier own experiences, if there is no alateen in your area go to an al-anon meeting, they have to let u stay if there is not alateen meeting available to you. here is the toll free number it is international so u will find the help u need. 1-888=4alanon just ask about a alateen meeting in your area.

If you would like some alateen postings from thier daily reader , let me know and I will send u some they may help. abbyal2003@yahoo.ca

Your not responsible for anyones behavior but your own. good luck Louise

abbyal · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi Again Megan , sorry don't know what happened to that private message u left for me , but somehow I lost it . sheeeesh . I am so sorry u have to go thru this at your age, I am assuming that you are a teenager, I hope u will use the number I gave you to call and see if there is an active Alateen meeting in your area. It will help u alot to sit with other young people who are going thru the same things as you are.

Your mom has reached the stage where alcohol is running her life at the moment, this is a disease and it takes them places they never planned on going. Here is an address of an AA speaker site where u can sit and listen to speakers talk about how they changed thier lives It may help u understand how and why your mom is doing what she is doing and offer some hope that she can change her life around when and if she is ready.

http://www.aaprimarypurpose.org/rotation/speakers2.htm

u can down load these or just sit and listen to them. Pick tapes by women in recovery. I noticed that the first lady on the list is someone I ahve heard before , she is pretty raw and tell s it the way it was for her much like u describe your mom. good luck hon and take care of yourself. hope this site helps a little .((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))Louise and again feel free to email me anytime.

lildee · Senior Member

Dearest Princess,

Simple answer (for me) God. When I am troubled or in pain or feel that I am getting weak I turn to God. I pray only asking Him for guidance to my problems.

If my prayers were not of a nature that God would answer, I turn to my group, I network, I draw on the strength of those who are stronger than me.

Get on the phone and talk to people with similar problems. No one can understand you better than someone who has been through it.

These are just things that I do to keep me strong & sane. I hope some of them work for you.

Love & God Bless

lildee

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.