Debilyn:

The brain is interesting.  In a previous post, I talked about how our brains actually create patterns and grooves that can be viewed after we die showing where our thought pattern was primarily through our life.  So if you've always been used to feeling or thinking a certain way, the brain actually digs a rut, so to speak and so then any emotional trigger we have tends to stimulate that part of the brain and our thinking becomes that of where that groove or rut is in our brain.  It was fascinating to hear this because it made me realize that alot of times the things I think about is probably more based on my brain being addicted essentially to that thought pattern.  For instance, the love I have for my ex A as well.  I have my moments and times that I miss him so much.  However, I think of the concept of retraining my brain.  haha  (It kinda seems funny, but it's working)   When I begin to think of those special memories and the man I love so deeply in my heart, I immediately FORCE myself to think of the negative times together-- the drinking and pain associated with our time together and essentially it eases my need for him.  I suppose what I am doing is retraining my brain to rather than feel those emotions of love for him in a particular groove in my brain that I am creating a new groove that will take me away from that thought. 

It is proven that we only use a certain part of our brain mostly throughout our lives and like I mentioned above, when we die if they do an autopsy they can specifically tell what areas we most concentrated on throughout our life based on the number of patterns, ruts or grooves in certain parts of the brain-- so if we were emotional and in love they can view that part of the brain and see that we had those emotions.  If we were mathmeticians or chemists, they can see a different part of the brain for controlling that thinking process to show that is what we primarily thought of during our life. 

What I find most interesting about this is that it helps me to understand that even though we have our emotions that we think we should easily change when faced with a "trigger" at times, in which our brain actually craves whatever emotion or feeling it is used to that ultimately we can change our thinking by learning to rethink.  :)  Of course, it takes time to get us out of that rut though...  haha 

Take Care and hang in there.    Just remember, train your brain to turn your thought pattern into another direction and the more  that you do it, the easier it becomes because you are physically creating a new pattern in your brain.   Having said that it just became clear to me about the concept that is typically stressed in continuing to be repetitive in something we want to accomplish in our lives.  Apparently, that must have to do with this entire concept because ultimately if we continue to think a certain way or have a certain behavior it gets easier in time.  All because our brain is learning to use a different part of it and so it gets easier to not fall back into the "rut".

I suppose that is why me attending school, working a full time job, starting back at the gym and taking my focus off my ex A is helping me cope so tremendously.  I'm using a different part of my brain.   

 HUGGGGSSSS