The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I really could have saved his truck, but in the end I turned the problem over to him. He sold the truck and even got a little used car in the deal. He paid his mom some of the money he owed her and gave me $400 for groceries. He bought each of the kids a pair of shoes and four outfits a piece for summer. I even got a new purse. He said it made him feel good to take his money and go out and be able to do something for his family. He told me the other night that his addiction has overpowered him and he is afraid it's going to end up killing him. He was aiting for me to talk/lecture/beg/fight because he used all of my money on Thursday to buy drugs. I didn't say a word. That puzzled him. He kept telling me "Come on, don't let it build up inside of you. Let me have it." I told him that I believed everything has already been said. I was able to let it go at that. I didn't let him pull me into the crazy making. I am proud of myself. We were able to get along this weekend and be drug free for a couple of days. The only problem I see is that because we had a good weekend, he thinks I have forgiven and forgotten everything. I have not and will not forget. It's a lesson learned.
Glad to hear you're having a good weekend, one day at a time. Your words about forgiving and forgetting struck a chord with me, as I am the type that once I am hurt and that hurt solidifies, I an unable to forgive...ever. Won't even get to forget. I wish you well on your journey.