The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I watch how much my mom(A) drinks. At times I want to search everywhere in the house for hidden bottles. I haven't searched though. I know watching and wanting to search are only hurting me but I don't know how to stop. Any suggestions/solutions to my problems?
I know how hard it is. Believe me over the years I have become an super sleuth and searched everywhere, but he still managed to hide them better than I could find them.
One night a few years ago, he was passed out in bed. I searched for hours and found dozens of empty beer cans. I then lined our room with them, to make a point. There where stale old beer cans everywhere. He woke up the next morning looked around, said what's your point and left the room. I got to clean up the stinky mess. It is not worth it.
My A didn't hide his bottles, he just went out to the bar. So, I'd drive around town until I found his car sitting outside one of the bars. Then I'd think "OK, I know where he is" and go home. What good I thought that would do me, I cannot tell you, but I really felt like it was something I HAD to do. To me, this is one of the proofs that the disease really had made me insane. I was following a mindless compulsion just as much as he was.
I used to look for my husbands empty bottles, or possibly full ones, but to no avail empty or full another one would take it's place you can dump it out or scold it will never go away until the A wants it to themselves, the best that we can do is stand back and love our A and instead of picking them up or dumping that bottle so they have 1 less drink is to turn all of our energy on ourselves. Good luck and god bless love ya Stay strong my friend
I used to always watch how much they drank my parents were both drinkers. They drank at least 24 a night on weekends more. I did dump and search the house once in a fit and ended up dropping a beer bottle and then falling in the glass. After that night, they started to hide it not very welll by putting it beside them if they heard me come out of my room or coming in from somewhere. It just stressed me out more. I suggest that you try to right away change your mind when you get the urge to dump your moms alcohol. Like go to your room listen to music or something you enjoy or go for a walk anything to change your mind. Try not to watch when you dont have to.
kerry
__________________
Life can only be understood backwards, But it must be lived forwards
