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I watched Oprah today, and she had two girls on that were the subject of interventions(they were drug users, but honestly, it's not much different than alcohol), and I sat here wondering if that would work on my h, the alcoholic in my life.
I am not sure, as he is back on the kick of not wanting/needing any help, he doesn't want to stop, he's fine. Plus, his family is in TX (we are in the midwest), and they tend to be pretty big enablers. My family would help, but I am not sure I would want to, or it would be best to put them in that position.
So can anyone fill me in on interventions? Doesn't Al Anon discourage them? How do they work?Whom do they work best for?
I know a little about intervention, was told at a treatment centre that it is very risky. It takes months to plan with councelors etc. The whole family must be involved and all on the same page. If there is one weak link in the family and the A figures out he has a ali , everyone looses.
The only way I know that truly works is for him to hit his own bottom in a natural course of events. It has to be his decission or it won't work he does it for himself or not.
I am sure if u were really wanting to try this that a treatment centre would answer your questions for you , perhaps someone locally could help you get the info u need. good luck
Over th years I have spoken to several intervention counselors. They said the same thing Abbyal said, it can be very risky, and if it is to work, everyone has to agree and support it. If even one person who the A is close to is even hesitant the A will use that as an out and alienate everyone else.
I have never been able to use an intervention with my husband even though the kids and I have always wanted to. His parents and his sister have always been his biggest enablers and have always fought for him to keep drinking. They will not allow him to hit bottom, never mind participate in an intervention.
If you do consider it, research it carefully and get a very competent intervention counselor to help you. The wall has to be solid with no way out, and you have to paln it very carefully.
Hi Cah ! We went through an intervention with my oldest son, about ten years ago. He was dual-diagnosed (as they call it) with schizophrenia and addiction--the addiction part being a sort of "self-medicating" way of handling a brain-disorder that is terribly frightening to admit to. Even worse stigma here than alcoholism! He had been in and out of jails, hospital, disappearing for days on end, living on the streets, even in the back of an abandoned car for a while. It was ABSOLUTELY heartbreaking--but somehow or another, mostly through working the ACOA and Al-Anon programs as best I could, we got to the place in our family where we recognised that if we didn't do something, we would lose him! We agreed to all meet (and this involved people from three different countries), and spent several days with my son, expressing our concern for his survival and how much we loved him, and just give the treatment a shot at any rate. He "heard" this, and it's my feeling he was near his own hitting bottom anyway, and we checked him into a hospital for treatment. He has taken it on himself to accept and work for his own recovery, and now he has become quite an advocate for NAMI (National Alliance for the Mentally Ill) on the local and state levels--speaking at conferences, (he was just here in our city speaking at a CIT conference to do with jail-diversion for the mentally ill, and decriminalisation trainings for law-enforcement people that's happpening across the nation now), writing to the newspapers, organizing the local Walk the Walks, and so on. It is a miracle in our lives that we are ALL very grateful for! Readiness has something to do with it--also lots of courage, and finally, a LOT of grace!
There is hope! Learn all you can, and mostly, keep working your own recovery.
Can't offer any insight on interventions, as I've never been involved in one, but, so far as I can tell, al anon has no opinion on them. They would qualify as an outside matter, that we cannot endorse or condemn, just as we wouldn't tell you which treatment centre to go to. What we can do, is help you to get the sense of serenity, and confidence in your own judgement, so that you can make up your own mind.
