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Post Info TOPIC: Traits of son's mom in son...


Senior Member

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Posts: 281
Date:
Traits of son's mom in son...


My ex-wife had this philosophy: Although she should not have to suffer the indignity of working for a living and thus not have much money, she still should be able to drive a Cadillac car. Scheming was her way of making that come true… always, 24 – 7 scheming. So, my son goes to an accountant and files for back tax returns. He gets a little tax return. So, today he calls and says I need to write up a statement for the six months that he paid for rent when he paid rent through me for the rented house we shared. My son has poor reasoning skills. Some of which could possible be related to a closed head injury he experience as when a small child a lot from horrible role models and abuse. So, I let him know that he only paid about a month and a half rent for the only five months he lived there. He responds by telling me that he had have live somewhere for six months so that means he had to have paid rent: living somewhere = paid rent, as two = three. I guess one can claim rent deductions on taxed income. I do not pay tax because I am on Social Security Disability Benefits. So, I have no need to claim rent. He accuses me of making him loose money so I can claim more rent deductions. I do not usually tell my son he is this or that, but this time I kept telling him that his thinking is off and that I do not know why, (but, I am sure that I do.) He says that I telling him of the amount of rent he actually paid was bullsh*t, hanging up on me a few times and so the verbal abuse went on. However, surprise, surprise he does call back one more time and apologizes for all he said to me telling me that I do not deserve that. He still says I am wrong about not doing that document. He also says that he took care of it himself and said with an air, "See I can do it." After calling the old landlord and finding out he was not on the lease agreement, he called his accountant and now he has to pay back $200. I reminded him that him knowing me he has and will gain more that $200. He has a couple of record lists of couple of thousands dollars owed to me that I told him it would be very long time before he can pay that back. I do not really expect him to be able to pay it back and I am straight with that. I only expect him to keep up with his car note to me. In his 29 years on this earth if all I ever spent on my son is a couple of thousand dollars and that is to give him a in effect a first start in life… I am grateful. I filched when he told me about the $200 payback and almost said I would cover that, however, my God jumped in and I held my tongue. One of things he said is that I did not understand being broke as he is. While he knows me, he will not go hungry at least. Way back when, my stomach hurt so much from hunger pains and drinking tons of water did not get it, I stole food to eat… I know.


Hugs & Luv,




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cdb


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1197
Date:

Hello Richard,


You sounded so patient and calm about this. I don't know if you were, but you sounded like you handled this pretty darned well :).  It is hard to deal with a kid that has poor reasoning skills. You very well know that the highest of IQs have poor reasoning skills too. Some geniuses cannot take care of themselves or even drive a car. Every one has value and your son seems to know that he does too because you love him and care about him. I do so admire how much you have bonded with your son and what a great relationship you two have in such a short time. He has learned so much from you. I am really amazed at this fast progress since we first met here.  It gives me hope for my daughter too.


My daughter didn't get her taxes done on time the past two years. This year she is close to the date. The difference is that hubby and I are staying out of her business. She is only recently sober after all. And it is her business and not ours. This is a great place for us to know each other and share and learn!  your friend in recovery, cdb



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