The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I went to my first Alanon meeting back in CT the end of 2002 when I moved back to live with my parents at 43 years old. Before I go any further let me just say that both my grandfathers died due to alcoholism. One before I was born from cirrhosis, he was only in his 50's, the other spent 10 years in a nursing home with alcoholic dementia before he died.
The previous year I had ended my 20 year marriage to my psychologically unstable ex and had moved on with a new love. He turned out to be a late stage alcoholic. Though somehow that hadn't bothered me until he put me into financial ruin and ran off to Vegas. Alanon got me through some real challenges.
Since then I have gotten back together with my alcoholic love. We have moved back to our cabin in the woods in upstate NY. He almost died twice last year due to bleeding esophageal and gastric varices due to cirrhosis. But by the miracle of modern medicine a shunt was put into his liver to lower his hepatic portal blood pressure and he is doing ok now. He has spent the past year trying to maintain sobriety on his own and finally recently decided he needed the support of AA.
At the moment things are good. We have a "real" honest and loving partnership. I was forced to file bankruptcy last year. Not a good thing, but, at least it has given me a fresh start to go with my new perspective on life. I have come to strongly believe in and trust my HP. Changed attitudes can really make a difference. Like they say keep working the program, it works and you are worth it.
Wow... your post really helped me alot today. I wanted to thank you for sharing.
I am very recently divorced from the love of my life. There were alot of horrible things that have happened... some from him, some from me... he was drunk.. what's my excuse???? When you were describing your end stage alcoholic, it sounded so like my own. He's got portal hypertension.. he has bleeds from the varices. That is part of a few things that prompted me to put an end to it.... now, looking back, I wonder if I was trying to *force a solution*..... I just don't know.
A friend told me to check this board and ya'll out... and I will have to say.. my friend is a very wise person... alot of good program here. :)
Thank you for sharing....
I continue to grow... sometimes it's very painful.... For now.. I need to keep going to meetings and keep the focus on me... progress, not perfection, right?
I am happy to see you at the message board! :) Your story started bringing tears to my eyes. We all learn from everyone here and thank you for sharing about you. Keep on posting. your friend in recovery, cdb
Thank you for your responses. I am glad to know that what I had to say helped in some way. Keep the faith and keep working the program. Serenity can be found.
