The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well it is so good 2 b back-was skiing up north 4 a week with both healthy and unhealthy family members and I need to be coming herre and to meetings.
some thoughts on ealrier meeting: I heard others sharing at meeting and I could relate to both gratitiude and to someone wanting 2 get loved one into treatment. I have both going on. And it is the gratitude that is keepng me sane today while we go thru the wait period about whether or not HP wants us to push 4 intervention/treatment once again with our teen.
I have truly surrendered it 4 today. I know that when I am trying 2 drive the bus it is out of my fear and therefore not trusting Hp 2 show me how and when and if I am to step in
I know my motives must be pure—I have 2 be doing an intervention 4 me and not with the motive of thinking that I have control or a cure 4 the person..if and when I do this it must be because I feel it is something I must try and would regret never trying at life’s end and I must totally let go of the outcomes--see it as HP's will whatever comes or does not come of it.
From what I have seen and read Treatment is proven rather ineffective if the treatee is unwilling
I have 2 leave it up 2 HP whther it will actually work 4 this kid or not or whether it is just one more chunk of positive education 4 him to later make up his own mind whether or not to apply to his life.
My HP is speaking to me thru other al-anons, strangers, songs that suddenly are on my mind lately that I cannot attribute to just having heard in the grocery aisle.
When I listen to the words in my readings daily also lyrics that suddenly pop in head and get my answers and it right now in translation it is saying "stand by him but detach a bit more, support without controling, wait, don’t step in at this time—not right timing 4 an investment of this much $ or energy right now"
I listen to my inner feeling and IF I feel a Desparate need to act immediately it is usually out of fear but if there is a calm about it then it is HP. But I must do step 11 (maintain conscious contact-sincerely ask 4 help thru quiet prayer and meditation and surrender to HP’s will) to really quiet myself enough for all this to sink in.
So I am a little anxious today, but really working the gratitude—walking around my house saying things out loud that I am greatfull 4 from my heat, and from the fact that I am dealing with an addiction with son rather than terminal cancer, from al-anon and friends and living in U.S. rather than third world
I am greatful,TRULY grateful for so much! everything from healthcare all the way down to duct tape (an onlooker watching or listening to me this morning would think I was a looney tune, but my al-anon sanity is more important than appearances and anyway who is looking in my windows? Just HP and he applaudes I am sure)
I am grateful for all the wisdom i hear here so i must keep coming back to stay sane and strong thru this and all of life's tuff stuff!
I would love to hear any one's thots on all this and what works 4 them,
Thanks-Luv
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Wishing all the best on your recovery journey, Luv
Glad to see you back and that you posted here. Sounds to me like you have everything right where it should be, i.e. your thoughts, prayers, meditation, etc. etc. I find when I am thinking about all the things in my life I can be grateful for that it calms me and brings my focus back to where it should be and that is on me and my HP. It is such a relief when we can surrender to our HP (mine is God) what is on our minds and hearts. It especially helps me to think that things are exactly where they are supposed to be at this moment and that my loved one has his own Higher Power who right at this moment may be bringing him to where he needs to be in his life.
It works if you work it...and you are working it!! Will keep you, your son and your family in my prayers.
Love in recovery - Jeri (Shimo)
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The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
We have done the interventions, the rehab and AA with my husband. As of yet, none of it works for very long, and he seems to become an educated A, talking the talk, but not walking hte walk.
The one constant has been Alanon. I can't control what he will or will not do, but I can work on me and how I deal with or don't deal with things.
You can't count on what the A will do, I guess when they are ready, they will take to a program, or not. But you can care for yourself, it does work if you work it and to me is the difference between living and existing.