The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I've been best friends with this girl for the past two years. Last summer, we were out playing pool and met two men. After we finished playing, we decided to leave. I was walking out the door when I heard one of the men ask for her or my number. She said that we were not interested and walked out. We got into my car, and she told me that the guy asked for her number. I felt betrayed because she lied to me. I did not care whether anyone asked for my number; however, it was the lie that bothered me. Am I expecting too much from a friendship? I have always been totally honest with her. I thought that for once in my life, I had found a true friend that would be honest.
Kissers, honesty is VERY high on my list of people I trust. (I can say I don't have a great many friends.) I would be very upset if someone did that to me--what your friend did. And, I would not trust her. Anytime someone deliberately distorts the truth, I begin to keep my distance from them. I have a close friend at work, and I have felt that she has not been totally honest w me in certain areas. As a result, I can't be as close to her as I would like. I know her limitations. I still like her and am her friend, but I don't trust her so much. I hope this helps a little. Peace to you. Annie
Thank you for responding Annie. My father did this to me last year. He told my friends(right in front of me)that he came running down the hallway and tripped and accidentally broke my bedroom door down. What he really did was broke my door down in a rage and was going to punch me. My reality has been distorted my whole life by others. Through Al-Anon, Therapy, and God, I am starting to see more clearly. Thanks again.
I call this a red flag. For me I would confront her, maybe say, hey I thought that guy asked you for MY number? did I hear that wrong?
then put it in her lap.
We are human, sometimes we do things for dumb reasons. but now you are aware, if something off happens again....well then it is up to you to accept her as is or not.
We can only change ourselves, no one else. but we can decide who we call our friends. welcome, glad you posted. love,debilyn
It's too late to confront her about what happened. And, if I would have confronted her, I have a feeling it would have been very ugly. I think I will just detach and focus on me and make new friends. Thank you both very much for your advice.
