The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have not posted in a long time. I have been checking on those I am familiar with but not felt compelled to post about me in some time.
Well, I thought it was about time to post something upbeat!!! I am smiling more and more these days. And laughing too. Oh how good it feels to have something to smile about, to laugh about. Life is picking up for me.
Sure my ex is still in and out of the picture, which does tend to make things difficult in the smile department but I try not to let it get me down. He is doing great!!! He just switched jobs, back to the one he had 2 years ago. He will be making less money for a while but promotions are hopeful. He is a hard worker and they know it. He just had to get his foot in the door and then will move up. He is talking about going back to school too. We'll see how that goes.
He is giving me money every week, some weeks more than others but that is ok. Any amount helps. And he has been giving me my space for the most part. He has been drug free as far as I know since July and I am hopeful he will continue to stay that way.
We have had some drama with my 14 year old son. He is really going through some emotional riff raff right now. Very defiant towards authority. That has caused some stress and heartache but I pray it won't last too much longer. I do know that he stands a very good chance of repeating the 9th grade - failing just about everything and doesn't seem to care. Maybe he will pull through, maybe not. I just pray that he will do better next year, no matter what grade he ends up in.
My daughter is doing great, loves school and of course trying me at every corner. But I am trying to set down rules to follow and enforcing them. It is a work in progress for us all but doing well with it I think.
As far as me....well, the reasons to smile and laugh are b/c I am breaking out of this shell I have been in for 16 years. I have no plans of getting back w/my ex and once I set my mind and heart to that, I felt great relief. I am more open to other people and invitations to get out and do things are starting to fill up my calendar. I went out for a night on the town a couple of weeks ago and had a blast.
I have met someone too. Well, rather, I have known him for a year and there has always been a physical attractions between us. We've talked A LOT and gotten to know each other but have not ever been on an actual date. He makes me laugh. A simple text message from him saying "Mornin" makes me smile uncontrollably and amazingly giddy. I cannot remember the last time I have felt this way. I am not looking for anything serious, just something that makes me feel alive again and I am getting that from this. How amazing it is.
My only dilemma is how my ex will react when he realizes that we are definately done and that I have moved on. I have tried and tried to get it through his head but he can't seem to let go. I don't predict a pretty outcome from that - at least not in the beginning. He will be mad and hurt but I believe he will eventually work through it and we will be able to be friends again. I hope.
jes take it one day at a time, QOD, u don't have to plan out anything or worry about anything having to do with anyones future: your own and especially not your ex's!!! J.
Good for you, it's about time you get some happiness. I wish I could meet someone but perhaps I am destined to work all the time and be alone. It's getting a little old after 18 months.
