The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The definition of courage is the ability to conquer fear or despair. In the past we may have been called courageous because we stayed in circumstances that were difficult or nearly unbearable. We may have felt that walking away from family, children, or friends was cowardly or displayed weakness. We may have felt that by holding back our tears we were stronger people.
Yet all the things we may have viewed as weakness are really signs of courage. All the things we believed to be acts of courage were really not courageous at all. If we walked away from difficult or unbearable circumstances, we would be conquering despair. If we cried, we would have been courageous by letting go of our fear, pain, or sadness.
Courage doesn't mean putting ourselves in stressful or unpleasant situations. Courage doesn't mean controlling our emotions. Courage is the ability to strengthen ourselves against the fear and despair of life, rather than be drowned by it.
What have I done today that took courage? I can be grateful for my courage and strengthen it.
This sure shows the different perspectives to look at what is weakness and what is courage. I'm the one in the middle looking at both options. I feel comfortable in one camp but feeling it's definately more healthy in the other camp. The good thing is that it isn't a black or white reality, there are many shades of gray so I am pondering which shade of gray is my color.
Thanks for the opportunity to think about this and showing the issue with words that are understandable.
hugs, ddub
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"Choices are the hinges of destiny." Pythagoras You can't change the past, but you can change the future.
I like the saying that courage is fear that has said its prayers. I don't believe that courage is the absense of fear, but rather, moving forward in spite of it. I now realize that almost anything worth doing usually has the element of fear attached to it at least the first time around. But fear is really emotional energy that is much better to move through, rather than try to avoid and side step (stuffing it). Not that I'm very good at that yet, but I do strive for it.
Anyway, good post. Food for thought.
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~Jen~
"When you come to the edge of all you know you must believe in one of two things... there will be earth on which to stand or you will be given wings." ~Unknown