The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
i went for the interview on Friday and I felt it went well. I could have done better on some questions but I think I did pretty well overall. I hope I manage to get in there. My current job is up in the air. They are looking for someone but they expect me to stick around for ever for that. I am not willing to. I've done enough handing my job over to someone else stuff for a lifetime.
I asked them at my current job if they were extending my contact and they said probably but the paperwork did not get processed so I am going to presume I will be out of there in January. Don't get me wrong I'm not going to go if I dont' have anywhere else to go but I am not going to hope either.
This last week was a really difficult week at work. I'm in that cycle. I owe so much money my debt payments are actually more than my rent (which is one reason I share in a house). I can't even make all those payments. I have been offered a deal by a credit resolution agency but I need to know I am going to be able to make those payments before i get into it. I will if I can get another job that is long term.
I'm also in a place where I badly badly need dental and medical attention. That all keeps getting put off put out there. In these next few weeks I may just go to the doctor regardless. I have so many things that need to be taken care of. The issue for me is that I get no sick leave and its hard to take less money when I had time off at Christmas I am going to have that hit me in the next pay check. And yes when I took time off at Christmas you guessed it everything was closed so there was no chance to go to the doctor!!!
I am playing it by ear. I keep getting to tick some things off my list. I just hope working on it some more will eventualy gather momentum for me. I'm working on turning it over every single day. Do my best turn it over. I do not have control over so many things.
What a post! Let me get my breath back. I had to take a moment remembering when I was back in that position also and I focused on your, "but I'm not going to hope either" statement cause that gave me a spiritual knee-jerk reaction. I remember feeling hopeless at one time when I was new to the program and then was asked if I was really feeling hopeless or helpless because feeling hopeless was like knowing and believing that there was no solution for me so why try. Helpless could be taken care of by asking for help from others, being humble and admitting my powerlessness by myself. I remember coming to the realization that I was in the program and was looking and asking for help and that because I was seeing others coming out of what seemed like to be impossible situations and getting happy...that I would also if I did what they did. I found out that I was really just scared and doubtful and that with practice those would disappear in time. I have witnessed a couple of hundred or thousand of miracles in this program. Miracles for me come about when I turn the situation I am afraid of and powerless over to my HP and the program and in HP's time without my effort and beyond my abilities I recieve a solution beyond my imagination which solves the problem or relieves me from the fear of it. It comes about totally from within complete trust, hope, faith, patience and commitment to the process.
Do what you have to do. Do it with faith, trust, hope, patience and commitment. Keep an open mind that what ever solves your need will come in the way your HP wills it to come out without your push or shove and in your HP's time regardless of your time table. You must do your part with all the spiritual tools of your program and you must turn the outcome over.
Miracles are surprising and can make you feel from just pleased as punch to giddy as all get out when they happen for you. Miracles can surprise the most learned of people and mostly will just make the ordinary person feel loved and special. You are loved and you are special. Have hope because of that. Do your work. Turn yourself over. Be open to your miracles. The first miracle is you just like every other member of this forum and the AFG.
"If you keep and open mind you will find help. There is no situation too bad to be bettered and no unhappiness to great to be lessened..." Paraphased from the closing statement to Al-Anon face to face meetings. I know that this is a true statement because of course this has happened to me.
I haven't interviewed in 15 years. Not happy with my present job. Good pay and I can make it on my own without my AHsober who left. But it is scarey. I need to get the resume out there and jump in. Good luck!
