The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
You and I are in a relationship which I value and want to keep.
Yet each of us is a separate person with his own unique needs and the right to try to meet those needs.
I know that when you lash out at me in anger it is because you are in pain. I will try to have sympathy for that pain.
I will not accept your accusations or blame for those feelings; neither will I take your pain into myself.
I will respect your needs as much as I can while always respecting my own needs.
I will not search for solutions to your problems nor seek to solve your dilemmas... I will take care not to ask you to solve my problems or take the blame for them. Each of us will maintain his or her own dignity.
I promise to listen to you without judgement, always reserving the right to feel good about myself; I will not allow my character, my looks, or my intelligence to be assassinated, nor will I assassinate your character, looks, or intelligence.
I reserve the right to continue to develop as a person and will not allow you to interfere with this right.
My prayer is for a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship, and to that end I will strive to become what I am capable of being. I pray that you too will strive to become what you are capable of being.
__________________
The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
Thanks for the great post on detatchment!! it was so good I copy and pasted it so I can print it out and look at it. I will put it in my journal as a reminder.
Thanks for the inspiring post. I am learning more each day how to live and let HP quide me through this journey.
I printed the post to help me deal with it all. I really needed to hear something encouraging to show me that what ive been feeling in my heart is right.
Bless you all Cookie
__________________
A person's a person no matter how small --Dr Suess
You and I are in a relationship which I value and want to keep.
Yet each of us is a separate person with his own unique needs and the right to try to meet those needs.
I know that when you lash out at me in anger it is because you are in pain. I will try to have sympathy for that pain.
I will not accept your accusations or blame for those feelings; neither will I take your pain into myself.
I will respect your needs as much as I can while always respecting my own needs.
I will not search for solutions to your problems nor seek to solve your dilemmas... I will take care not to ask you to solve my problems or take the blame for them. Each of us will maintain his or her own dignity.
I promise to listen to you without judgement, always reserving the right to feel good about myself; I will not allow my character, my looks, or my intelligence to be assassinated, nor will I assassinate your character, looks, or intelligence.
I reserve the right to continue to develop as a person and will not allow you to interfere with this right.
My prayer is for a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship, and to that end I will strive to become what I am capable of being. I pray that you too will strive to become what you are capable of being.
