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I haven't been here in ages but I hope ya'll can help. I went to a get together at a friends house and I knew before we went there would be drinking which was fine. I told them as long as nothing got violent or rough I would be ok, but if it did get out of hand I was going to leave right there and then. Nothing happened, it was all in good fun, safe fun, everyone slept over except me an my hubby. Okay, my friend brought some premixed cocktail and I tasted and liked it so I drank some more, nothing happened though, and we were there for hours anyway and this was at the beginning of the night. After the party, I started thinking. The reason I don't want to drink at all is because I'm afraid of becoming my mom, the A, and that frightens me. Its almost like I'm afraid to taste a drop of alcohol because the second I taste it, I would become addicted. I talked to my dad about. He says how do you know if you don't try it, but i'm afraid of trying it and finding out that I'm just like her. I don't have that urge to "I've got to drink to forget or get over... this" you know what i mean? I just don't want to not do something because I'm afraid. My dad has a lot of control over what he does or does not do. I won't ever get drunk, but I don't want to be afraid to take a small cocktail every now and then. Does anybody understand this?
RC
PS. I hope this post doesn't offend anyone, this is not my intent, I'm just really confused.
Research on alcoholism has shown it to be hereditary. Those who have a parent(s) who are alcoholic are advised never to drink. It's not worth the risk. As a professional once told me, you could be one drink away or 500 drinks away from becoming an alcoholic since you have a parent who is an alcoholic. Maybe your fear of becoming an alcoholic is a warning you should listen to.
Although my parents are not Alcoholics, my husband is. I have the same feelings that you seem to be having. I do not like to drink at all anymore. I hate what alcohol can do to a person. Honestly, if it feels wrong, don't do it. I understand not wanting to not do something out of fear. Sit and really think about the reasons that you don't want to drink. Quiet your mind and really wait to hear what you think. You may be amazed at how much more there is than fear.
I am not the ACOAs but I certainly have enough aunts, uncles and cousins who are. I also use to work the graveyard shift at an all night diner. I saw plenty of drunken behavior there as well. After seeing all that behavior I vowed never to get like that. Now back in my youth (which wasn't so long ago ) I had my share of hangovers. Frankly, I never liked the aftermath. Who wants to feel that crummy?
I think the longer I live with an A (active or sober it doesn't matter), the less I want to drink. I certainly don't drink at home. Occasionaly I may have a glass of wine with dinner when I'm out with friends. But even that isn't enjoyable for me. Here it is, fall, my favorite time of year. I use to love to open a good bottle of red wine and cook with it or sip it slowly and enjoy the beauty of a fall afternoon or cool evening. I have no desire to do that anymore. I just don't care about it that much. Is that part of living with an A or just me? Don't know. Good post.
Love and blessings to you and your family.
Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
I do not come from an alcoholic background; I simply do not like to be around people who drink. OK, a glass of wine is fine, or an occasional mixed drink. But steer me away if, "all my rowdy friends are coming over tonight." I understand how you feel.
Perhaps your feelings are a not-so-subtle intuition; maybe, like me, you are just repulsed by the whole thing. Don't be confused...it's the way you feel. And that's that!!
Take good care,
Diva
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"Speak your truth quietly and clearly..." Desiderata
Thanks! I do not ever plan on getting drunk, having the aftermath of a hangover.. nothing like that. Just one mixed drink or something at a restaurant or party without feeling like I'm a drunk.
) I had my share of hangovers. Frankly, I never liked the aftermath. Who wants to feel that crummy? 
