The material presented
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information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hi All - into over a year of my recovery and have finally found serenity for me. I am out of the fog I was in called insanity - yeah! Part of my past behaviors was to always be on the go, once I'd hit a point of discontent, I was on to another boyfriend, another job or another state. This year has helped me see that and to help me see what I was running away from - myself and my feelings. I've moved through those painful feelings and am at peace with who I am and what I need.
I had two goals for myself this summer - 1/make some healthy friends in my area (I've been here a year) and get involved in my community to remove my lonlieness and 2/ find a new job (the job I am in feels like an alcoholic home - distrust, indirect communication, passive/aggressive behaviors, inconsistent rules). I love the work that I do, I love that I have a very flexible schedule and I love that I can dress how I want - very freeing. I love that I have a 20-25 min commute. I don't love the alcoholic enviroment aspect or that they've fired 5 people out of 12 since I've been there. One of the owners always talks about weed. The money is ok but not enough if I hope to purchase a home in the area. That's why I started looking, not that I was trying to avoid my feelings.
So I've been offered a new job - it is totally corporate, more rigid rules, from 12 people to over 2000 and close to an hour commute for me now. There may also be some travel. There are fabulous benefits, great increase in salary and experience. There is room for growth and opportunity. I will know the rules and where I stand.
There are definitely pros/cons and I can rationalize anything to justify my decision. I'm starting to worry about if I take the job with that affect my goal #1 of makign friends in the area - will- socializing after hours, working out, getting involved in my community with a longer commute, and traveling, how will that affect my golfing and yoga classes which I've grown to cherish? Will I be too stressed from the long days and hard work? My fears are all over this.
I don't know unless I try. Or do I stay in my current environment with all the flexibility and free time in my schedule (and no travel). I hate to pass up such a wonderful new opportunity - I want to make a healthy choice for my recovery and what I need. I'm praying for God to guide me.
Thanks for any insight you may have and for allowing me to write out my thoughts, that always is a blessing for me. With hugs and love, Twinkie At any rate, I've
Wow it sounds like you have a big decision to make. Jobs are always hard to ponder, especially when you take into consideration all of the pros and cons you mentioned. I want to congratulate you on your growth in the past year and your successes!!! Now there are more choices and more fears to face. These are the ups and downs everyone talks about in life! Facing your fears and just "jumping off" and making a decision is one of the hardest things to do in life, don't you think? I wish you luck whatever you decide, and yes, praying for guidance is a great thing to do, somehow you will feel the right decision.
I, too have a few decisions to make, so I know your feeling. I have been laid off from the law firm I work at (after just coming back and being rehired at the end of MAY!!) and i am pondering going back to school and becoming a nurse, or continuing in the field that I have been in for 20 years and dreading it! Fears of going back to school after 40 are very real to me, but hey, life is short and we need to follow our dreams.
It sounds like there are a few things to decide for you, but you will make a good decision, it sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders. I wish you luck and love, AND you are really great to get involved in your community (or desire to!) What a good soul you have!
PHEW!!! Big, BIG decision twinkie. And I would not even think of advising you. I tend to be the type person who would consider my present job...it's convenience, and its familiarity. One the other hand....a new adventure, better salary, good benefits, and travel certainly do sound pleasing. And I think I would probably toss the caution to the wind and GO FOR IT!!! The only drawback, for me, would be the commute. Oh how I hate long comutes. But hey! Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
I wish you peace and serenity in making this important decision. And which ever future you choose, I wish you great happiness.
Diva
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"Speak your truth quietly and clearly..." Desiderata
Good luck with your decision and congratulations for even finding your self in a place in life with options like this! Just my two cents....I have an hour commute to work and I LOVE it....it is time just for me and often the time I get to think most clearly. No kids in the car, no chaos, rushing....just me sitting still driving and being. I also get to leave the stress of home at home and chill out a bit on my drive to work...then I get to let the stress of work wear off during my drive home so I arrive back to my kids a little more relaxed than if I showed up straight from work. Most folks think I'm nuts for this, but it is what works for me. Best wishes, Fifi
I have been struggling with this too only my job is great. I need more money and my commute is 45 mins each way. I have good benefits and only work 4 days per week. I also tend to be a job hopper (another running aspect perhaps?) I have lived in 3 states in 5 years and 5 homes in 5 years. My longest job on my resume is just over 2 years. On the one hand I'm not really making it financially but somehow stay afloat and on the other hand I love my understanding boss and my flexible schedule. I have decided to stay here for a while longer to add time on my resume and try to pick up a second job on Friday and Saturday nights as a waitress. This should resolve the money issue while still allowing time to be with the kids on the weekend days. I know that a large part of the reason I stay here is because it's easy, I like the schedule and I like my boss. If one of those things were to change (mostly the boss) I would look elsewhere. I know fear of change is part of it because I have it pretty good here despite needing more money. But, if I were to leave and HATE the new job then I would be stuck. For me I think the second job is the best bet. You know what's best for you, if you hate your work environment that much, maybe a change would do you good?
