The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
One of the previous posts talked about maintaining our fabulousness. Its a great concept.
Let me consider ways I can maintain mine.I think mine involve taking care of myself.
I take time to pray and to walk.
I brush my teeth every night, regardless of someone waiting for me in bed, and every morning, no matter whos waiting for me in the car. I moisturize and use sunblock. I well you get the drift.
I take time to read The New Yorker, my favorite magazine. It takes time, and it gives me things to think about, a few laughs and some gossipy news.
I get my oil and tires checked.
I now feed my retirement fund before anything goes in our joint account. What my mom and dad left me is still in my name only. I read my bank and investment statements. I try to have a grown-ups relationship to money. I no longer emulate an ostrich.
I maintain contact with my sister and with my friends. No matter what, they will never have to guess whats going on in my life. I will not isolate. Their presence in my day-to-day foundation is very nurturing and fun.
I treat myself to friendships with people I admire.
I listen to myself, to my knowledge of what is right and wrong, and to my feelings.
With all of this, I now see how much more I like myself than when I entered AlAnon.
Im looking forward to seeing other peoples fabulousness realizations.
Ive enjoyed thinking about this. Thanks for bringing it up.Jill
1. I actually soap up my hands while in shower and gently and lovingly wash my feet...it's a little special thing that means I'm taking the time to care for me.
2. I get together for lunch with an alanon friend, or two, maybe once or twice (or three times...) a month, at my suggestion.
3. I take time to be by myself and take long walks to clear my mind and think things through.
4. I take time to buy the things that I NEED, not listening to anyone asking me "do you NEED that??" I'm 45 11/12 and if I think I NEED something (items of necessity, and maybe an inexpensive non-necessity occasionally) I will get it, if I can afford it.
5. I take the time to make MY dental/eye appointments, because my eyes and teeth are important for my well-being!
6. I try to do things of interest to me, even if my A doesn't want to do them, because I'm not getting any younger.
7. I tell myself that MY LIFE MATTERS!
There are more, but these are the things that come to mind right now.
This is great! And, since I am feeling down right now, I especially need the reminder .
Here's how I maintain my fabulousness:
1. I've started a new morning routine where I do some daily Alanon readings, listen to gospel music, and spend some quiet time with myself. This gives me a great foundation for my day--puts me in the right frame of mind.
2. I've been trying to take a regular daily walk or bikeride. I take regular walks around the golf course near my house that has a wonderful walking path and lots of scraggly wildish land around the edges where I get to see everything from butterflys, to rabbits.
3. I love to cook, so make great food on the weekends to support healthy eating throughout the week. I make a big pot of something for lunch or dinner (I don't mind eating the same thing multiple times a week). I also make a big batch of heart-healthy granola full of walnuts and dried fruit (dates, craisins, blueberries, cherries) to eat each morning with soy, rice, or almond milk. I am part of a CSA (community supported agriculture), so I get fresh veggies each week, and I experiment with trying new veggie dishes.
4. For some extra nurturing, I just bought a great smelling body wash--pomegranate and mango--a shower poof, and a back scrubbie. Boy, does it feel great to lather up now in the shower! I love the soft scrubby, scrub feeling on my body. I also try to do regular spa days at home, and when I really want to treat myself, I go for the very luxurious 2-hour massage at the local massage school.
5. I meet up with, talk to, and try my best to stay in touch with all of my friends--near and far! I have some great long-term friendships of 10, 12, 15 years and I feel very fortunate to have the depth and breadth of these friendships. I also try to stay in touch with and nurture my family. I try to live "provide comfort for families of alchoholics" by practicing my program around my family without being overbearing or I-know-it-all-ish about it.
6. I floss. No kidding. I have had teeth problems and so it's become especially important to me to do this small gesture to nurture my teeth and maintain their health.
7. I attend Alanon meetings regular; celebrate my Alanon anniversaries with pizazz; and try to meet up with and talk to my Alanon friends regularly. In the near future (within the next year), I would like to get to an Alanon convention.
1. I brush my teeth every day. I know this should be a given, but I didn't growing up. (OOPS... I think I just shoulded on myself.LOL)
2. I start each morning with a cup of coffee and my ODAT.
3. I'm trying to get more cardio exercise so I started putting the 2 boys up on older sons horse and walking. Added benefit is that the baby is tired at night, so I get an hour to myself Yeah!
4. Trying to get to at least 2-3 f2f meetings a week.
I may think of more, but its bedtime.
__________________
~Jen~
"When you come to the edge of all you know you must believe in one of two things... there will be earth on which to stand or you will be given wings." ~Unknown
i just logged in to say good morning to myself,(france) and what a great topic! i'd been shoulding myself but now i'll re-frame my thinking.... 1. i go to bed early enough to get 8 hours min. 2. i take responsability to earn instead of worrying and resenting. 3. i practise my god given talent for art, even though that nagging voice says get a real job! 4. i take on only what i'm capable of doing without losing my serenity....even if that is only one tenth of what i think a 'normal' person 'should' do. 5. i trust god to provide. 6. i listen to that little warning voice when i meet new people, i don't have to love everyone. 7. i use whatever alternative therapies i find effective in supporting my serenity. 8. i give thanks.
thank you everyone great topic! i practised none of the above before alanon.
As the originator of the descriptive word, "fabulousness," I can tell you that it is a state of mind. When we keep our minds positive, constantly receptive and brilliant, we maintain our "fabulousness." Then all that we say and do has the air of the fabulous connected with it. There is no list, per se, of what makes us fabulous; there is simply that state of mind that dictates it.
Diva
__________________
"Speak your truth quietly and clearly..." Desiderata
