The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I had another garage sale last weekend and in the process reinjured my healing back! I stayed home yesterday because it hurt so bad I couldn't get from the bed to the bathroom. I slept all day on muscle relaxers and percocet and ibuprofen. Today is a little better but I'm scared to death that I won't be able to lift boxes for the move either this or next weekend. Any volunteer helpers?
I signed the lease last weekend so the condo is a go! The realtor is trying to get the old tenants out this weekend so we can move in before school starts on Monday. I still have packing and cleaning to do and even the pain pills aren't working! I sold the old station wagon and after the garage sale I stuffed all the leftovers in it and they took that too so it saved me from having to donate it all! It was a carload! All the A's clothes and stuff were in with the garage sale stuff so I'm totally free from his things. I pray pray pray that my back is miraculously better immediately!! LOL
Regarding the divorce: the reason I wanted to file now is that I am moving to a diff. county and you have to have lived in the county 6 mos to file there. So if I don't file this week I will have to wait 6 more months. Plus, I know where he is right now and he's set to be out the beginning of October. That was why the rush to file. If I file now it's been a year and we are still in this county, otherwise I have to wait at least six months and may not be able to find him to serve him. The way it works here is a simple divorce (I can do that myself) all the assets stay where they are and there is no further discussion about it. Either way I have to have him sign off on the title for the car and I have a protection order good till sometime next year. I will have to apply for custody at some point but I might be able to get help with that thru legal aid. Seriously thinking about filing on Thursday or Friday and being done with it.
Here's some real NON alanon advice :D take the ibuprofen around the clock at the max dose, that's what'll really get the spasms down, if you take anything at all. OK, I said that and now . . . and drink LOTS of water.
Good for you!! I still have pill bottles with my A's name on them all over, my eyes still skim over his stuff laying here and there, and I'm wondering if it is "bothering" me internally, holding me back, to have it all over the place. Seems obvious but hmmmmm. . .
Your post brings up "baggage" for me. You got me thinking.
How will you feel to have NO baggage, divorcing him now and moving into the new digs free and clear? Talk about a fresh new start!
You are an inspiration as usual! I'll bet the kids are excited too. Good for them. And for you! Keep us posted and rest that back when you need to :) Kim
Go for it girl. It sounds like you have thought this through and you know what you want and how to do it. I'd say, you have everything lined up. Just do it. Get it over with. I didn't realize moving out of the county delayed things. I knew moving out of the state complicated things but not counties. I thought it was all a "state" thing....not county thing. Oh well. Live and learn I guess.
I am so sorry you hurt your back. And right before the move? That stinks. But look at the positive side: You got rid of all his crap and you don't have to mess w/it again. YEAH! Wish I could get rid of my AH's crap. I would sell it all if he was locked up for 6 months or something but he's not. He is actually working right now - 72 hours last week alone.
Oh well. Take care of your back and hope you feel better soon. Sincerely, QOD
What is that saying? Life is what happens when you had other plans?
I sure hope your back is better. You know worrying about it makes it worse! Hard not to I know. Sounds like you have a plan for the divorce. It is a sad thing no matter what. You were sure strong to get rid of his stuff. good for you.
Some day you will look back at this hard time, and be soooo glad to be where you are.
Please take care of yourself, people get sick and hurt, life happens. Allow yourself to be a friend to you. Isn't it strange? I believe we had so much of the A being sick, and we could never get sick as they would not take care of us or put us down...we have to relearn it is ok to be human.
Not saying you feel this way, but I used to feel guilty for having a headache and taking meds. Of course I was a drug addict when I took med. gads.
