The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My name is Anjie. I am a stay at home mama of 3. I am married, have been for 10 years, been together for 13 & a half. My husband is an alcoholic. And I have spent pretty much my whole life with alcoholics, my mom was an alcoholic, my dad is an alcoholic, my brother is a whole other story. I have even spent a short time in rehab & AA for some bad choices as a teen. I have never been to an Alanon meeting though. And honestly, I didn't feel like I needed one until the last year or so.
My husband is a fully functioning alcoholic. In the nearly 14 years we have been together he has drank every single day, with the exception of the times he was too sick (from the flu or something) to drink. In his eyes, he is not an alcoholic. He feels that an alcoholic is someone who drinks hard liquor or someone who drinks from the time they get up until the time they go to bed. And naturally, I am wrong when I try to tell him otherwise.
The last year has gotten alot worse. I think I have finally reached the point in my life where I am tired of being surrounded by mean drunks. So, I decided that when my kids go back to school & my 4 year old starts pre-k that I am going to a meeting.
I came across this message board in my online searching for meetings. And I was reading a bit here & there. But I thought the considerate thing to do would be to introduce myself & tell you a little about my situation.
Thank you for reading & thank you all for being here & telling your own stories!!!
welcome. This board has been a gift for me...it has helped me get through some really tough times. Stick around, the people are great, they care, AND they know what its like...because they either have or are still going through it themselves. Hope to see more of you on the board. *I'm rather new myself. : )
helo Angie and welcome . Great decission to get to an meeting , it will truly change your life for the better . It dosent matter wether your husb admits to being an alcoholic or not what matters is how it affects you when he does . Al-Anon is for you about you . There is nothing ucan do about him but alot u can do for yourself . goodluck keep commin back l Louise
Welcome Anjie! This board has been everything for me! The support I have gotten here has been incredible. I left my husband a year ago with 3 kids so I know where you're at with that. The more I posted and got the poison inside me out the better I did. Plus, this board has kept me strong in my decisions, it's always here for me and I have a good group of people who I know care about me and my kids! Thanks for taking the first step and posting!
Welcome, glad you found us. I am married to an alcoholic who is now sober. I agree with abbyal that going to a meeting is a great decision. I know for me alanon changed my life. I felt a weight being lifted off my shoulders when I heard ...I didn't cause it, I couldn't cure it...and I couldn't control it ...those are the 3 C's. Being with those who understood my pain was a real comfort to me...and knowing I wasn't alone anymore. For me coming to this board and the chat room and my face to face meetings are my lifeline. I hope you keep coming back.
First of all I love your Pic - LOL - That sounds like a professional alanonner
I too have a very high functional A who doesn't see his drinking as a problem, it took me many years to figure out myself that it was a problem because he wasn't the traditional "drunk." Talk about denial!
You will find so much relief in Alanon -- even in all the craziesness. Just being able to see that you have choices, options, on how to act (not react) to the chaos is so empowering.
I am so glad you are here -- let us know how your first face to face meeting goes.
Welcome Anjie, all I can add is to repeat that Alanon will only make your life better whether you are with the alcoholic or not, whether or not he drinks or not . . . Alanon is about living life in a new, positive way, it's so down to earth and REAL that I feel like I've stumbled onto a "wisdom tradition" by coming here.
Let us know how the meeting goes!! I know this board for me is crucial, as I live out in the sticks with limited meetings. I can check in any time, I can read old posts . . . I've gotten as much out of "old posts" and feedbacks as the new stuff!
Welcome! Keep coming back. I go to face to face meetings in my area as well as come to this board to help me through when getting to a meeting is not realistic or my sponsor is unavailable. It took me 20 years to finally get to Al-anon after someone suggested I go! I wish I would've - I could have saved so much time and energy and misery for myself. But regardless I got here on God's time, not mine and I am grateful beyond belief. Wishing you well on your journey and congrats on taking the first step!!
I have looked up the meetings in my area & there is a beginner meeting every Wed, Thurs, & Fri mornings.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous. I feel like this is a big step. And I have been putting it off for over a year. I had every excuse in the book for not going when I first decided to look into it. Then I put it out of my head for a bit. But now, with my girls going back to school & my 4 year old starting pre-k, from 9 to 12, I feel like now is the time.
I will definitely let you all know how it goes!!! Thank you again!!!
