The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Here's a good one from Erica Jong . . . "Take your life in your own hands and what happens? A terrible thing: No one to blame."
I am finding myself MIRED in blame and resentment right now. It's so all over inside me I didn't even see it was there. All of a sudden it feels like the heavy weight that it is. I'm going to put it down right now.
It never occurred to me what PAIN I cause myself when I indulge in blame. At first it seems like blaming removes pain from me, but isn't there a second law of thermodynamics stating no energy is ever lost? Maybe instant relief and a sense of power from the anger, but the long term effects of blame are just becoming apparent to me. I've got a lot of thinking to do before I go on and on about it :), just wanted to say this post hits home for me today!
So good to see you posting again. I'm forever talking to my kids about "shifting the blame." Being accountable for our own actions -- whether we like it or not-- is accepting ourselves as we are. Once we do that we have a chance to make changes...bring about our own happiness Who would have thought?
Sometimes we just don't realize that we give away much of our own power by blaming our lot in life on others. It is empowering to find out that there is another way. I'll never forget the day that happened for me. It was like taking my life back, finding out I wasn't just being tossed about in the wind, and that I actually did have control over something -- me.
This program is a new way of thinking. Only it takes someone else to open our minds to that new way. Phil -- it is frustrating, we want everyone to find that peace and become aware that much of our pain is actually a choice -- sometime it takes us a while but what a wonderful thing to see someone get it.
I hope you'll keep posting and sharing you ESH.
Luna
oh, and I've been told by AAer's that every thing after "But" is Bulls**t -- in Alanon our wall are built out of "yes, but..." LOL I told my sponsor that she put up with severe "but" abuse until one day I finally came to understand.
Who would have thought? 