The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Sometimes just writing things down instead of just thinking them, gets us motivated to get on with life with things that are important for our health and minds. Those of us who live or have lived with active alcoholism become stagnant in life, and feel nothing is worth the effort Sometimes even getting off the couch to get to an alanon meeting was too much for me, however I made a commitment to get better, and I literally forced myself to do so "once a week". I had used up all my excuses, I am too tired, just not into it, I feel it is not helping , I cant get there, I dont have a ride etc etc. Once I started on that regime of having to go for that one hour, I realized that "it was helpng, I was getting empowered to get on with "my" life, and start doing things to make "myself" feel better. Each time I left I had a sense of relief, that I need not suffer anymore, I had choices, and mainly I had a life to live whether if the Alcoholic drank or not, or if he was here with me or not. I began doing things for me, things that made me feel better, started going out, shopping for myself, or at least window shopping. I started to excercise making my endorphins in my body giving me that "good" feeling. I started to go visit friends or have friends and family over again to my house. I began cooking and baking again, my passion. I started to remember and relive the things I used to like to do, and how it made me feel better to do so. I am asking this question to all of you to share, and give hope that all is not lost, and as in alanon it says,,,,,,Work it because YOU are worth it.
Your post is really encouraging to me. I am at the point where I am forcing myself to go to f2f meetings (wondering if they really are helping). I am greatful for this wonderful website. I have shared a couple times in the on-line meetings and that has felt really good. I too have started focusing on myself and my daughter and getting out to do things that I like to do. I don't know that I would call it my reaching out to new friends, but I used to always put off getting together with my daughter's friends parents for play dates when they would ask, but I have recently been getting into that and meeting new people that are really nice. I have also reconnected with family that I had always put on the back burner, fearing that my A b/f would have a crisis, etc. I have been focusing on eating better and am feeling physically better than I have probably in years. I still have a lot of anxiety about my situation and the future, but I am working on it, at least trying to...one day at a time. Progress not perfection!
Wouldn't it be great if there were a "self-care" police? That would give you a warning or a ticket when you are not taking care of yourself so that you would do more self-care. Or even the site of their "lights" would make you sit up & take notice - like when you are driving on the interstate & you see a State Trooper on the opposite side of the road - you check your speed to make sure you aren't speeding, use your blinkers, make sure your seat belt is on, all those type of safety behaviors. We should be doing these things all the time, but we all get lax in our attention to what we tend to classify as minor details.
For me, prior to recovery, self-care is a minor detail. Still can be if I don't stay focused on my recovery.
Ok - so this is a warning - keep up the self care or you will get a visit from the "self-care" police
wishing you peace, Rita
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No matter what me and my God are going to be ok, even better than OK -
Thanks for the great post. I don't want to go to a f2f meeting, I guess I'm scared and have a 100 excuses why I don't have the time but your post is really encouraging. I will make a to do list and put f2f at the top!
Good post, gg! As a matter of fact, I am making an appt. with my dr. tomorrow to see if she thinks I would benefit from going back on my antidepressant meds. I have been having that super tired, achy, headachey feeling again. Am so tired. That is how I felt before. So, in response to your challenge, I am going to the Dr., and tomorrow begins day #1 of my calie-reducing diet, and I am going to start back to Curves. Was feeling much better when I went. Why do we KNOW things that help us, but we get complacent in our attitudes???? I loved the self-care police idea! My new motto is :commit to myself, or just commit myself (to you-know-where) I have a choice. I am making the right one. Love in Recovery, Becky1
