The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's reading is about how worrying, for some of us, has been a way of feeling in control when things around us are out of control. The writer realized in al-anon that there are no gains to worrying over things we cannot change. As with any defect or habit that needs adjusting, the writer decides that worrying needs to be replaced with something positive. When he or she started to worry, he/she would write down any specific fears that came to mind and then asked HP for help in separating the real and imagined fears.
Personally this reading has made me remember times when I felt a bit paralyzed by fear and worry. All I could do was fret- over time I have recognized that I don't want to be unable to move forward because of fear of the unknown. I know I can trust in the tools that I have and the wisdom of my HP to guide me so that I can see clearly.
Good Morning Mary Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this important concept. Fear and worry were my "go to" tools before entering program. Learning how to keep the focus on myself, live one day at a time,share my concerns with others, use new tools to live by helped to reduce the worry and fear to manageable proportions.
.Today when i sense these negative monsters stir within, I am so pleased to have the serenity prayer, meetings, and slogans to help restore my serenity. Thanks for your service.
Thank you Mary for the daily and your service. Sure hope you've recovered from your run!!
Thank you Mary and Betty for your ESH. Fear and worry were also my go-to. For my entire life, I had a lovely aunt who would always simply say, "If you are worrying, you are not praying." It took me coming to Al-Anon and working this program to realize that's so true for me. If my mind is full of worry, I struggle to clear it and pray/meditate for direction from my HP!
Anytime I realize I'm obsessed with fear/worry, her voice and those words pop forward. She passed away 12 years ago and yet she lives on with her simple wisdom...
Happy Sunday to one and all - off to a meeting, then having brunch here to watch Chiefs game and then softball this evening, weather permitting! Full, fun day - make yours lovely too!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I have been trying to find another "way in" by using different words, for the same thing- worry, anxiety, stress.... fear springs to mind.
Fear of a fear-filled future... that was my life when i had few resources and little direct help. So I just had to battle on until help arrived.
Getting to a safe space inside of the rooms was a good start. I sometimes wonder if I am getting enough out of life. I used to vow and declare
that I would get even with life by getting better- a good goal.
"Think" is a key Alanon slogan. And since sitting down to share some thunks sprang to mind.
Being able and allowed to kick back and talk about the journey is a good mark. Especially, and mostly, with others who were there with me.
There was something else i did mean to mention- and the 'think' thing prompted me. Sometimes ah was thoughtless and couldn't care less- until reality hit me again.
I had no balance or serenity... getting off of a bumpy ride and staggering... finding good company helps... learning to both listen and speak- invaluable.
Taking things one day at a time; and as an adult child- one time at a time- gives me achievable goals... a godsend...
Mary, that was a nice share that you did...I relate to the worrying about the future and I would "what if" myself to insanity....now I LOOK at the situation, call a friend, go to a meet, call a recovery mate, do something to break up the negative energy of fretting about the future or a problem that I am "awfulizing" to death..making a huge mountain out of a small pile of dirt......sometiems I just walk away in my head and just step back...breathe....deal later with it.......anything to break up the negative energy that will grow out of control if I keep feedng it with fear..........Thank you for this !!!
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