Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene

Melmel69 · Newbie

Grief

Jen61 · ~*Service Worker*~

I have not but I am very sorry for your loss.

Doingmybest · Senior Member

I am so sorry for your loss.

I have had no experience in loosing a spouse, so my words are only from someone who loves deeply. Please take time for yourself during this sad and emotionally draining time. Perhaps attending a grief support group or connecting with al-anon friends (if you're already a part) or making new connections (if not) will help you deal with the horrors of this disease.

There are no words to ease your pain, but know you are cared for and about.

I wish you peace.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Hello Melme Welcome I am so sorry to read of your loss and am sending my condolences.
To answer your question , Yes, I have lost my son to this dreadful disease and can certainly identify with your loss . I found attending alanon meetings, and joining a grief support group, helped me to process my grief and discover gratitude and peace once again. Keep coming back

Jerry F · ~*Service Worker*~

((((Melmel)))) sad with you as the loss of loves to alcoholism and drug addiction is particularly hard. I suggest finding a fact to face Al-Anon meeting and attending for 90 days. That worked for me tho my grief was the loss of my alcoholic/addict wife and marriage. Keep coming back (((hugs))) smile

Mirandac · ~*Service Worker*~

I am so sorry for your loss, a grief support group would be
Great right now then when you are ready alanon face to face
Meetings.

Let yourself really grieve your losses, ex or not does Not matter.
I found my grieving very theraputic and cleansing during and after
My divorce. I did a lot of recovery work then too.

My ex BIL just died he was active A most of his adult life and had
An Ex wife and two adult children. I hope they are all grieving him
when there is alcoholism and major unresolved issues its A deeper
And very confusing sense of loss. None of them ever dealt with the
elephant In the room. He died of a heart attack he had a hole in his
heart And should not have been doing any drinking. No one is in any
Type of recovery and my sil remarried but still had her demons from
Her first marriage. We talked about it who knows out of my hands.

Take care of you and welcome

Hugs

((((((( melmel))))

Freetime · ~*Service Worker*~

I am sorry for your loss. I lost a husband to complications of the disease. I do understand the grief. I found that going to Al-Anon meetings was especially meaningful during the time immediately following his death. It was such a comfort to be among people who understood how it feels to live with and lose someone with alcoholism. There was no need to pretend to feel a certain way ... I could be completely honest and know that I was heard and understood. Whatever is the opposite of "alone" ... that is what I felt when surrounded by fellow Al-Anons.

Hugs and hope for more peaceful days to come.

Iamhere · ~*Service Worker*~

Melmel69 - welcome to MIP - glad you found us and so very sorry for your loss that brings you here. I have no experience with direct loss because of this disease, but have seen many good, loving, kind people pass this earth as a result of it. Know that we are here for you and you are not alone.

Keep coming back - prayers and positive thoughts headed your way...

Bethany66 · Senior Member

I am sorry sorry for your loss. I know of a member of my F2F group who recently lost a spouse due to alcoholism and he often refers to a book available in the Al-Anon literature that deals with grief and loss.

www.al-anon.org/b29.html

It brought great comfort and clarity to him during his time of loss.
I pray peace for you today.

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene

"Folks are usually about as happy as they make their minds up to be." Abe Lincoln