I saw it on TV. The economic imbalance that exists is a global issue that affects us as a human polity. The only way I could crawl out of poverty and economic abuse truly was to practice both the 3rd and 11th Step and still is. When I think my security lies in outer forms, I get shaky and scared. When I realize that turning my life and my will into my HP's hands and seek only knowledge of His/Her will for me each day is the way out of fear of financial instability or the experience of it. A friend once said to me that he believed that financial instability has a spiritual solution. I don't know how true that is and yet I do know that practice of both those steps, making a gratitude list, and remembering to live one day at a time keeps me from falling off the ground of a steadfast faith into the pit of fear/terror as to how it is I will make it/survive/thrive. I've learned that's my HP's business. Mine is just to show up and listen.

I allowed my x to handle all the money. I would willingly crawl into his car every two weeks at noon and give him my check. We'd drive to the bank where I'd endorse my check and he'd endorse his and then he'd deposit it all, handle it all, take me to where he wanted to go for lunch, and drop me back off at work. Then, I'd go home later in the day to make supper for a husband who didn't show up because he was spending our money at the bar or wherever he went. I never really ever knew. I sold Tupperwear to earn some kind of spending money because he wouldn't give me any or much of my own check and he'd call people asking if they knew where I was and that I was having affairs when he knew exactly where I was. He just hated that he couldn't totally control me and my ability to make my own money. It took me awhile to wake up to just exactly how I was helping this disease trap me and use me for its own gain. I see many women still in those same kinds of situations and it hurts me for them. Yet, I also know that there is help and hope for them if they get enough of participating in their own abuse.

Thanks for the thread, Temple. Perhaps it will help for others to know they are not alone and there is a way out of being totally dependent on another human being or systems that won't encourage freedom either.