MIP General Business Meeting To Consider Admin/Webmaster - Al-Anon Family Group

Tanin · Veteran Member

MIP General Business Meeting To Consider Admin/Webmaster

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

smile Thanks Tanin.

it was lovely to see the Alanon chat forum getting a reboot... with renewed leadership. smile Thanks.

1. I would like to see a "MIP Clubhouse" board set up alongside of AA, Alanon, ACA, NA and Coda- expressly to deal with management of the whole framework.

2. I would like to nominate Overcome as the MIP Administrator.

3. Would like to see one or two understudies working with Overcome... with the chance to 'learn the ropes...'...

Thanks,

David G,

Moderator for MIP ACA.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Thanks for your efforts Tanin

Mrs_Snoopy · Veteran Member

Thanks for your service to the group, Tanin.

In Recovery,

Princess K.

mamalioness · ~*Service Worker*~

thank you Tanin for your service......The new person elected should be w/out prejudices for or against any one or more members....A person who is equal treatment to all..Not just the ones they like...Someone who is open minded and willing to hear any suggestion without fear or favor....I don't have any nominees in mind, but it sounds like a very detailed and involved job, and like David said, maybe some backup or secondary folks to make sure job is covered

Freetime · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi Tanin,
Could you estimate how many hours a month, on average, the webmaster spends?

I have some interest in doing this service, but I'm thinking I might be best as a backup/co-administrator to share the work with someone who may have skills/experience I do not. I have the HTML skills for web pages, but don't have technical experience with forums or chat rooms.

Thank you for your service!

-- Freetime

a4l · ~*Service Worker*~

Thanks for your service Tanin and Hotrod, who bought this thread to attention. It seems like this role is purely administrative/technical. It sounds like a lot of work. I do not know who amongst us has a: the time and b: the knowledge. I would be interested in hearing via this thread from any who meet those requirements and are committed to the service. I think it is also a good idea to have a few other technically trained persons to have tasks delegated to as required so the webmaster is not stressed out.

Bo · ~*Service Worker*~

Tanin, I had contacted Betty with some questions, and the outcome of that discussion was a suggestion -- by her -- for me to post my questions, suggestions, etc., here. Thus, I am taking her suggestion. I apologize if this is not the proper forum, thread, etc.

While I understand there was already a meeting, and while I could be mistaken, I was under the impression that business meeting was to discuss the chat room, meetings, and some "transition" issues. Be that as it may, I would like to preface my points by saying that I clearly understand that this is not a conference approved forum. I have also read the guidelines that are posted here, albeit, I interpret them more as "posting guidelines" -- and I believe that is in fact what they are called. They cover some "basic rules" vis a vis of etiquette, prohibited offenses such as threatening, abusing, defamatory, and libelous material and posts. They prohibit commercial type activities, such as soliciting and advertising. In addition, these posting guidelines also speak to harassment, discrimination, and comments based upon race, ethnic, gender, or sexual orientation, also being prohibited. Obviously, those things, and more of the like are needed. However, I have read the guidelines. More than once. There is little in there as to how we conduct ourselves. They are simply some general posting guidelines. I just feel that over time the dynamic, the make up, of a forum changes. It lives, breathes, ebbs and flows. Thus, the guidelines either have to change or are not effective any longer. I also feel in the absence of substance guidelines, what does exist -- leaves far too much room for interpretation.

However, these guidelines also reference "the intended purpose of this forum" -- and, that is what I would like to suggest be discussed as part of a larger discussion. Rhetorically, what is the intended purpose of this forum? The banner, at the top of our page states...Al-Anon Family Group Message Board...The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level. However, where is the governance? Is it arbitrary? Decided by one? A few? An author or reader of a post? In this case, we clearly state alanon. We clearly state Family Group, and all of us understand what AFG means. Yet, there is a disclaimer. Does that preclude legitimate standards or principles by which we should conduct ourselves. This board clearly does deliver the alanon message of recovery. What about the other principles of the program? What about keeping the focus on the alanon program? Our program, our recovery. Yes, we speak of meetings, the steps, and the program. I get it. We all do. We deliver a message of recovery...However, are we interacting in this forum based upon the principles of the program we speak of? Are we interacting and conducting ourselves according to the principles of the program that we are delivering the message of?

That being the case, first, again, understanding that this is not a conference approved forum -- and being that the material presented here is not conference approved -- what principles do we abide by? What principles govern this forum and it's activity. We are "alanon" and we "promote" and "endorse" the alanon program is almost every post. We speak to the alanon program, present material, slogans, principles, and the like -- and we speak of the steps, the traditions, and yes, the principles. Yet, our forum doesn't operate under the guise of, is not governed by, and by default, nor does it truly accept and embrace the principles of the alanon program to the extent of governance. Thus, I suggest -- either in the form of a group conscience, or via discussion -- a discussion regarding the above topic/subject matter.

Second, when we go to meetings, in the openings of meetings, we often hear about the 12 steps adapted from AA, and we know that they are almost identical. However, even being almost identical, they are not, and what is different, and we hear it in the openings of meetings, is that this is the alanon approach, we have a different perspective, our focus is on us and our recovery, and so much more of the like. We also hear that if you are a member of another fellowship and/or 12-step program, to please keep that anonymous...in part, so that we can keep the focus on alanon and us. We ask members who are in AA to do the same, as our approach is different, and the perspective alanon brings for our recovery is different. To me, this is important. In meetings, people do identify themselves as double winners, they may even reference AA, their sobriety, etc. -- but the orientation is alanon. The focus is alanon and our recovery -- the recovery that comes from our program. And, in my opinion, it should be. I have read a great number of posts where the AA program is brought into an alanon discussion. I think there should be objectivity that looks at this, and integrity in the process -- which, yes, comes from guidelines, principles, and governance. I've attended countless alanon meetings and it is very, very rare that a "double winner" -- other than identifying themselves -- speaks of their recovery in AA, their journey, their sobriety, their program, etc. I wouldn't debate or discuss "why" people walk into the rooms of alanon, or "why" they come here. The benchmark, as we say in meetings, is that if someone's drinking bothers you, then you are in the right place, or you qualify to be here. I get that. Yet, here, in this forum, the alanon forum, being that alanon is one side of the cause/effect coin, at least to the extent that we come here, seeking, hoping, etc. -- the AA side of the coin is, and I'll be kind, very prevalent. I've also attended countless open AA meetings -- and I have never heard the alanon program discussed, alanon recovery, etc. I am not saying both are right or wrong, but I am saying that if this is an alanon forum -- the focus should be on alanon and our recovery -- and there should be governance. Alanon, as a program, has principles, which are the foundation of the program. The program, and meetings, live and breathe, operates, and exists, by principles. I understand that we do not. So what do we do? What do we operate by? To me, that leaves the potential for an open, vast, field of interpretation. That can lead to "make it up as you go along" so to speak. I am not saying we have that, but that is not what is needed to have principles, guidelines, and governance.

Third, I saw an inappropriate post -- very inappropriate. And, it was addressed. However, what's appropriate and what's not when it's not obvious? Is it according to the standards of any moderator? All moderators? The byproduct of one complaint? Two? Several? Does that bring about the pack mentality? In society, we have police...but there is still crime. My point, again, is the suggestion that we have rules and guidelines, that can be the model and standard for governance, and if needed, can be enforced. An example of this is -- and not to oversimplify, nor to trivialize -- the definition of cross-talk. That is something that should be defined, especially in a "dead medium" such as a bulletin board/forum, and it should not be done as a one-off, or myopically. It should be part of a process -- and guidelines.

All of this often is a catalyst for me to question -- absent the principles of alanon -- can we lose sight of what alanon really is...a warm, welcoming, understanding, safe place, where people come for help. Help. Help. Alanon is about principles...not personalities. How do we have the program element -- without the principles element. I get that some people like chocolate and some people like vanilla. I also get that some people don't like ice cream.

I think there has to be integrity -- in process, in governance, in principles and guidelines. But, for there to be integrity, those things must exist and live.

Thank you very much for your time, efforts and understanding.

Bo

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

Bo ... smile ...

well said and well thought out. aww ...

I wear two hats here. Mod of the ACA forum and a common or garden member of Alanon.

The topics you raise should be addressed. The issue here is finding a replacement, or replacements for Tanin.

My view is that our Alanon group sticks pretty close to the CAL literature and to Alanon topics. Of course other side issues come in which might be relevant.

Both you and I have been to lots of different Alanon meetings- and realise som eof the variations that exist, within the policy guidelines.

Wearing my ACA hat- our ACA forum successfully registered with ACA D-F WSO.

At this level, I feel, the more input the better... we are meeting here within the Alanon business forum. Alanon is by far the biggest MIP group. I believe it serves a very important purpose online- promoting the best that Alanon can offer...

DavidG.

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

Bo...

more... while in the US I have been to meetings in AA clubhouses in Sarasota, Atlanta and Rapid City.

I assume an Alanon group would pay a rental to the AA committee that operates the rooms.

The Alanon group here did apply for registration here with Alanon WSO some years ago- but was turned down because of some Tradition 7 anomaly.

18 months ago the founder of the MIP joint groups John F. Passed away. And we people had to step up and pitch in- to keep things going.

It does take time to sort things out... one step at a time... we are making progress here- and welcome input from all members in all groups. aww -D.

Mrs_Snoopy · Veteran Member

All great questions, Bo!

A Transition Committee was formed when John F., this site's Founder, passed away in February 2017. That group oversaw transition of the Webmaster privileges, paying web hosting bills, etc. It became dormant once those tasks were accomplished.

Perhaps it could be re-named now that the transition is complete. That is the governing body of MIP, including all five Programs.

The current task at hand is to find replacements for Tanin.

In Recovery,

Princess K.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Great points Bo-- I do believe that the Message Board generally promotes the alanon program and supports the following principles: The fact that there is a Power Greater than ourselves, that we can rely on. I see that most refer to the the Steps, slogans , Meetings and Traditions as key to recovery.

We support Tradition 2 which promotes the idea that this a fellowship of equals where with our leaders act as " trusted servants ". who do not govern. We do not give advice however will share our ESH in order to help each other .

We post daily readings from alanon approved literature and share and lastly we treat each other with courtesy and respect and Cross talk or taking another' inventory is discouraged. In addition we maintain the Step Work Board where a Step a month is discussed and hold daily on line meetings

Not sure what you need to see changed

Bo · ~*Service Worker*~

So let's get some clarity here. First, if the only issue on the table is to find a replacement for Tanin -- I understand. However, second, if transition is on the table, it was suggested I post this here and now, thus, I did. Lastly, this is either the appropriate time, and forum, or it's not. If this is the proper forum (no pun intended, LOL), then how do we proceed. Is it a group conscience, and if so, now, or at another time? Or is this a fluid discussion, and if so, now? Here, on this thread?

That said, if I need to eliminate my questions, and simplify my suggestions, I will do so. I felt that my questions, and suggestions, would make more sense when looked at in the proper context. Semantics aside, change, additions -- the genesis to my suggestions is a question of governance. Not being governed or policed, but more governance in the context of how we operate, conduct ourselves, aside from courtesy and respect. What guidelines do we operate under -- what principles guide us as to how we function, as a community, as an alanon group. While we may support and observe certain alanon traditions, and principles, I suggest that we incorporate more, if not all of them. This is not a simple, one dimensional, linear question/suggestion. If it were, I'd ask for a clarified definition, for this forum, of cross-talk. Or, I'd ask for the proper use of the quoting feature. I am not. I am suggesting that perhaps those things be incorporated into a larger discussion. I think questions such as those are reflective of the need for a larger discussion. Again, if now is not the time, say so, and discussion over. And, please clarify the proper time.

In short, let's have a clear set of guidelines and principles, by which members of a community, of a group, can have clarity around do's and don'ts, how we operate, what is permissible as it relates to sharing, posting, quoting, etc. Those principles already exist. Given the forum we are in, they can be incorporated, observed, and used our group/community -- and we can supplement that with guidelines for a forum such as this.

Thank you.

Mrs_Snoopy · Veteran Member

Thanks for your comments, Bo.

I'm not sure what the best forum is for your questions. Each Program here operates independently, except for issues that effect MIP as a whole. Al-Anon is the largest group.

Our ACA forum is different in that we are a bit looser on cross-talk. We share good ideas from anywhere, whether ACA Conference approved or not.

My question is whether your discussion applies only to Al-Anon, or to all of the groups?

In Recovery,

Princess K.

ACA member

Bo · ~*Service Worker*~

Princess K. --

My comments, questions, and the discussion -- was only suggested to apply to the alanon forum. If members of other fellowships feel these are topics that need to be addressed there as well -- that's fine -- however, let those members discuss and address those issues there, in that forum.

I am only focusing on alanon and the alanon forum, and I suggest we limit the discussion to same.

Thank you.

Bo

-- Edited by Bo on Tuesday 21st of August 2018 02:01:21 PM

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

Freetime wrote:
Hi Tanin,
Could you estimate how many hours a month, on average, the webmaster spends?

I have some interest in doing this service, but I'm thinking I might be best as a backup/co-administrator to share the work with someone who may have skills/experience I do not. I have the HTML skills for web pages, but don't have technical experience with forums or chat rooms.

Thank you for your service!

-- Freetime

I would like to nominate Freetime as an understudy for Hidden. smile ...

[coming from rural New Zealand- I tend to operate from standard meeting procedure... nominations, seconders etc etc... when there is enough interest to form a quorum! biggrin ...]

Maybe we should have a time limit... 2 weeks being the norm. A cut-off date?

I would support a third member- subject to a recommendation from Hidden and Freetime... but for this role maybe two people would work well?

DavidG

MIP ACA Mod.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

I second that

tiredtonite · Member

Thank you Freetime for offering to serve as webmaster if possible. Of course thanks to Tanin as well for current service.

-- Edited by tiredtonite on Tuesday 21st of August 2018 07:49:02 PM

tiredtonite · Member

Thank you for sharing (((hidden_in_plain_sight))) and thanks for your service as an op for our online meetings. I appreciate all of the points you have made about the website and your willingness to perform this service. It wonderful that we now have multiple people with skills and interest.

I would like to add another issue with the site. I'm not sure if this was covered by anyone posting to this board already. The site is not "secure." I know we've had this discussion on the Alanon board in the past. If you post under your nickname, that post can be found in a general search on the internet. I don't know if that bothers others but it has always felt a little creepy to me. Whether it linked to the Alanon topic one might be searching for online such as let go and let god or the poster, I don't know. Either way, I've always found unsettling. Thanks for letting me share this for consideration. ((hugs)) TT

Bo · ~*Service Worker*~

Excellent point tiredtonite...thank you! That is certainly something to be addressed. I don't think it is difficult to structure a site as "secured" -- although I can't speak to the "search" aspect on the internet. I don't know if that changes with secure vs. unsecure. Thanks again for the post tiredtonite.

Freetime · ~*Service Worker*~

I would like to second the nomination of hidden_in_plain_sight as MIP webmaster. I would be happy to serve as a technical/testing support, understudy, backup, or extra pair of hands to do time-consuming tasks if needed.

I agree with the technical concerns/opportunities that have been raised, and believe these can be resolved to the benefit of all.

HIdden, thank you for your offer of service! I know this type of work can be intense, but also extremely satisfying once completed.

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

tiredtonite wrote:
Thank you for sharing (((hidden_in_plain_sight))) and thanks for your service as an op for our online meetings. I appreciate all of the points you have made about the website and your willingness to perform this service. It wonderful that we now have multiple people with skills and interest.
I would like to add another issue with the site. I'm not sure if this was covered by anyone posting to this board already. The site is not "secure." I know we've had this discussion on the Alanon board in the past. If you post under your nickname, that post can be found in a general search on the internet. I don't know if that bothers others but it has always felt a little creepy to me. Whether it linked to the Alanon topic one might be searching for online such as let go and let god or the poster, I don't know. Either way, I've always found unsettling. Thanks for letting me share this for consideration. ((hugs)) TT

TT,,, this has been raised on the ACA board too. The new admins will cover the whole MIP clubhouse- Alanon, AA, NA CODA and ACA.

Alanon has a chatroom caucus- and a message board meeting too... with a bit of traffic in between...

there is a second proposal behind setting up the admins. That is setting up a stand alone forum for the combined MIP groups.

What suits Alanon may not suit other groups. The secure issue is a key one. My interest and concern is that it might affect accessibility. [By the way I am a complete luddite!]

But in the spirit of Tradition 4 every item has to be thought through and talked through.

At the moment I am the only mod on the ACA group- and I have to make sure our members are informed at every step along the way. If you know any adult children you will understand why!

in a format like this we can have very detailed conversations. We are transparent to members... obviously.

But once things are set up- the 'secure' issue should be close to the top of the agenda. In my view... smile ...

DavidG.

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

Freetime wrote:
I would like to second the nomination of hidden_in_plain_sight as MIP webmaster. I would be happy to serve as a technical/testing support, understudy, backup, or extra pair of hands to do time-consuming tasks if needed.

I agree with the technical concerns/opportunities that have been raised, and believe these can be resolved to the benefit of all.

HIdden, thank you for your offer of service! I know this type of work can be intense, but also extremely satisfying once completed.

smile smile smile smile smile smile smile smile smile smile smile ...

Mrs_Snoopy · Veteran Member

Lots of good discussion here!!

On the ACA site we had Tanin make our sharing forum Members Only. We have a Newcomers forum that is visible without logging in. Anyone can join, but at least that is one barrier to everyone on the Internet seeing our personal shares.

Hidden, are you proposing a MIP-wide overhaul, or each Program update their site, or both? I know we have a lot of outdated information.

In Recovery,

Princess K.

mamalioness · ~*Service Worker*~

tiredtonite wrote:
I would like to add another issue with the site. I'm not sure if this was covered by anyone posting to this board already. The site is not "secure." I know we've had this discussion on the Alanon board in the past. If you post under your nickname, that post can be found in a general search on the internet. I don't know if that bothers others but it has always felt a little creepy to me. Whether it linked to the Alanon topic one might be searching for online such as let go and let god or the poster, I don't know. Either way, I've always found unsettling. Thanks for letting me share this for consideration. ((hugs)) TT

Thank you Tiredtonite...I note that "next door" where I am a member, old timer, really in ACA we have membership only to see the posts...here, yea, they can surf something on the net, and see our posts...I've even googled myself and saw posts I've done here.......thanks for bringing up something I would like to see changed...."next door" we have a page for the "lurkers" to look and get a feel, but they must join to be able to read/post on the main board...It feels lot safer....

and I 2nd the nominees that David mentioned........Both sound real good to me...

mamalioness · ~*Service Worker*~

Mrs_Snoopy wrote:
Lots of good discussion here!!
On the ACA site we had Tanin make our sharing forum Members Only. We have a Newcomers forum that is visible without logging in. Anyone can join, but at least that is one barrier to everyone on the Internet seeing our personal shares.

Oh, hey Mrs_Snoopy, I would't have posted my post had I seen yours.....yea, I like the new "face" to our ACA site.....and yea, lots of good discussion here....

a4l · ~*Service Worker*~

I like the sites simplicity actually. It loads quickly, uses minimal data and is basic to use requiring no special skills or affinity with technology. I disagree that a cosmetic makeover is needed to fulfill the promotion as attraction aspect. Vehemently disagree.... members will stumble here as they are meant to, usually at wits end to discover a unique little niche on the web. That in itself is attraction. I have never had a problem browsing the site including meetings, on my mobile. I agree the dead links could be cleaned up or bought back to life. I saw the beginnings of a recovery repository and had that been completed/ maintained, it could have added to that unique attraction of this community. In terms of security, the option to lock the forum seems simple enough.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Well said A41

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi y'all,

some of us are being pulled up- for quoting another person's post.

This is a business meeting, not a sharing meeting. I do it here- and do not regard it as cross-talk.

I do it to address the issue of the moment and to prevent confusion.

it seems to me that so far, this is working well... aww ...

I think this way of having a meeting is a new ball game for all of us. If this issue is likely to create friction, then maybe we should discuss it?

DavidG.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

i can understand the objection I would not like to see my message posted in someones response as it would remind me me of living with this disease whereby I was constantly reminded of what I said and judged .

I believe we can respond to each others posting without having a copy of the entire message of another as a heading to our response . I see no reason we cannot restate the message we read from another and then share our thoughts.
Any business meeting I have ever attended does not restate everyones position before we make a statement. Here we have record as it is in black and white

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

smile Betty...

one of the rewards of service is that we get to enjoy each other's company.

We are all volunteers here. On these board i have raised conscience issues a few times. Without any hoo-haa. And tried to deal with it close to the source.

This post excluded- I tend to listen for a few days- and get a better perspective for myself. And if i started the thread- to actually listen and learn- then sum up.

With a Step 10 I ask myself if I am being hard on others, or on myself; or both. I am here to give myself a break, and others too. [Maybe not a good choice of words! biggrin ...]

I think we are here to get to know our new admins. To thank Tanin. And vice versa... ...to be people who will encourage and support... smile ...

It's a sunny day here, at last- spring is just around the corner. The buds on the almond tree are about to burst.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

I hear you David I spent the day at the beach myself and it was lovely

a4l · ~*Service Worker*~

So we have Freetime and Hidden_in_plain_sight as potential webmasters. Thank you both for volunteering. I like that Free time has humility. I like that Hidden has confidence. Both have the requisite experience outlined by Tanin in the opening of this post. What I'm not sure of is what the methods of accountability are for a webmaster. That's probably my own fault because the times for the online business meetings have never matched my timezones so I have only read a few old old threads where cal approval issues were discussed. I note that under point 1 as introduced by Tanin, there are some emergent currents towards changes which may or may not be neccesary. I think there must be a clear distinction between interpreting the group conscience and administering the site technically . When the founder of the site had full administration it was probably relatively simple. I know there were a few instances where at his own discretion if he had enough of a member, the member would be booted or blocked for a time period. A webmaster will certainly have this ability. So my question to both of the nominees and the transition committee is, to whom is the webmaster accountable? Under no circumstances do I think it is appropriate for a unilateral decision making capacity to be allowed by a webmaster. I think there needs to be a division of technical administration and conscience issues, with the former merely facilitating the desired outcomes of the latter.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

I agree A41 both Hidden and Freetime would make perfect replacements for Tann. as their skills set compliment each other.

As far as accountibility is concerned, we will probably need to address this with each and then take a group vote

mamalioness · ~*Service Worker*~

well, Betty since you are the moderator here, is it acceptable to use a sentence or two and thats IT re: responding to another..I have been so moved (thats my only reason for doing it) by others that I use it as a "WOW, I HEAR YA" thing.....so what would a sentence or two be???? I wonder if we should just ASK everyone how they feel , like a group conscience thingy....right there on the board or on another discussion forum so as to not spook the newbies......what do ya'll think?? David??? Betty????? anyone????

and the LAST thing I want to do is upset another, make them feel "in the disease" GOSH..that would be awful..I want to COMFORT, not upset another and I know my friends who do it feel the same, I would bet on it

-- Edited by mamalioness on Thursday 23rd of August 2018 08:34:28 PM

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

Hmmm before we lose off nominations, the MIP ACA group may have a nomination coming up, for an Administrator.

The last time this issue came up we were disenfranchised because we have overseas members- who could not make the chat meeting.

This is not at all to oppose the existing nominations- but would make the number up to three.

We need time to seek a mandate from our members for this move.

Thanks,

DavidG

ACA Mod.

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

DavidG wrote:
Hi y'all,
some of us are being pulled up- for quoting another person's post.
This is a business meeting, not a sharing meeting. I do it here- and do not regard it as cross-talk.
I do it to address the issue of the moment and to prevent confusion.
it seems to me that so far, this is working well... ...
I think this way of having a meeting is a new ball game for all of us. If this issue is likely to create friction, then maybe we should discuss it?
DavidG.

Hi y'all...

I am quoting my own posting here- to give some context.

Betty is a mod on the Alanon board and she had no jurisdiction here. She is another trusted and loved delegate.

I feel that is was not fair to go to her with the issue that was raised.

In keeping with our traditions and concepts of service- I feel the issue should have been raised to this committee, as a whole.

Therefore I am returning this issue to y'all to consider and contribute.

I have consulted with our members of MIP ACA and do not say these things lightly.

smile This is a new ball game for all of us- it gives us all a chance to build on John's legacy.

Thanks

DavidG.

ACA Mod.

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

Ahem...

I would like to nominate Mrs Snoopy, and the 3rd Administrator.

It would be up to Hidden, Freetime and Mrs Snoopy as to how this works...

but it would be envisioned that Mrs Snoopy would take primary responsibility for the MIP ACA board.

Mrs Snoopy as got good administrative and IT skills... she is a loved and trusted member of the ACA group- and has got good serenity.

smile Thanks Y'all... aww ...

DavidG.

ACA Mod.

Bo · ~*Service Worker*~

hotrod wrote:
i can understand the objection I would not like to see my message posted in someones response as it would remind me me of living with this disease whereby I was constantly reminded of what I said and judged .

I believe we can respond to each others posting without having a copy of the entire message of another as a heading to our response . I see no reason we cannot restate the message we read from another and then share our thoughts.
Any business meeting I have ever attended does not restate everyones position before we make a statement. Here we have record as it is in black and white

Betty, is all due respect, first, there is a "quote" feature here in this forum. Second, there is nothing in the so called "rules" that state using this feature, and then commenting on what the person said is in fact cross-talk. If that however is widely accepted as cross-talk, then it should be clarified and memorialized. Third, in my opinion, I don't see the difference in posting something and then having someone else quote it -- independent of the commentary. One's post is there as would be the quote. One post is OK, and the quote is a reminder? If someone is reminded by something they post, and it hurts them, bothers them, etc. -- then perhaps it shouldn't have been posted in the first place. If someone posts something and they can choose to never read it again -- why wouldn't they be able to exercise the same discretion and not read the post where someone quoted them? And, if someone quotes the post and says "Thank you, I am so glad you posted that, and it helped me tremendously" -- is that OK. The last thing I want to do is get into a ping-pong match of back and forth as to what's OK, what's not, etc. It's an exercise in futility so I apologize for using examples. I used them not to be a catalyst in starting the ping-pong match, but more to express and explain my point.

That said, if you feel that way, OK, I accept that and I respect it. However, in my opinion, that doesn't mean it's automatic being judged. Is every use of a quoted post a judgment? I for one don't think so. I think this specific topic is the perfect example of being worthy of a group conscience. Having clarity around the definition of cross-talk could only be a good thing. The definition as of now, if there is one, should be universal and known by all. Then, it can be respected and honored by all. In addition, whatever rule there is -- as the principles of alanon are -- should be about principles, not personalities. It should serve and help the masses, and may not serve and help every single person -- but should for as many as possible. The masses, not the few, or the one.

I attend many meetings, where in the opening they address and define cross-talk. Not every meeting has the exact same words, or meaning. I don't make a case for specific words -- but there should be words. LOL.

Bo · ~*Service Worker*~

DavidG wrote:

Hi y'all,
some of us are being pulled up- for quoting another person's post.
This is a business meeting, not a sharing meeting. I do it here- and do not regard it as cross-talk.
I do it to address the issue of the moment and to prevent confusion.
it seems to me that so far, this is working well... ...
I think this way of having a meeting is a new ball game for all of us. If this issue is likely to create friction, then maybe we should discuss it?
DavidG.

I agree David, however, I feel it should be done via a group conscience.